Close your eyes and visualize your body as an antenna, picking up invisible waves of energy from the environment around you. Feel the vibrational frequencies permeating your body. Do you experience a tingling sensation? Listen as your ears pick up sound waves coming in from all directions. Feel those same sound waves entering your body as well. Bask in the vibrations.
Feel the aliveness in your body as it breathes in air and expels it. Feel the body where it touches the chair you are sitting in. Stay with the sensations that are constantly being felt in the body. Give your full attention to the bodily sensations.
Do you notice that the mind goes quiet as you do this? Many people say they wish there was an off switch for the mind. Well this is it. You can’t give your full attention to your bodily senses and think at the same time.
Check back in with the sensations being received by the body. The head is the part of the body that receives the most sensations, like the top of an antenna. It hears, sees, smells, tastes, as well as feels.
Close your eyes again and check in with your head, the most sensitive part of the antenna. Listen to the sounds ~ Feel the face ~ “Look” at the empty space between your ears where the brain is located. Do you feel the alive emptiness of your head? It’s quiet in there even as it takes in sounds.
Focus on that silent, empty space inside your head. Focus on the silence underneath the sounds. If thoughts interrupt this silence, focus your attention on the silence underneath the thoughts, and on the silence which exists before and after the thoughts. Does this empty space in your head have any boarders? Keep your eyes closed and notice if that empty silence actually expands beyond the space between your ears. It’s all around the body, as well as within.
With your eyes open, look around and receive the visual input of the things around you. As you look around, wonder to yourself what it is that’s looking through these eyes. Look at the words on this page as if they are nothing more than shapes. These black characters are being seen by something. What is that something? Is it that same empty space behind your eyes? Focus your attention on that space as you read the following:
Space is behind my eyes.
Emptiness is looking at these words.
Is this what I am?
These words are being experienced, rather than read.
They are being felt as they enter the body through my eyes.
One ~ word ~ at ~ a ~ time.
With eyes closed, experiencing continues.
There is only this.
Silent experiencing.
Enjoy the peace that is available simply by paying attention to the experience.
Trey
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Inescapable Here
I’ve always been here.
Never to be anywhere else.
I can’t get away from here.
I try to be somewhere else, but I’m still here.
I leave and yet here follows.
I’m momentarily lost. Where am I?
I’m still here I just wasn’t looking.
I can’t get out of here. I can’t escape here. I’m eternally here.
I always thought I was going somewhere.
Now I know I’ll never get there.
Here is the only place on earth, and everything happens here.
Where else would I want to be?
Where else could I be?
We’re in the same here.
Together and here.
That’s where we’ve always been.
You seem to be way over there, but you’re still here.
Even when you’re not around, you’re still here.
My here, your here, our here, only one here.
Where is here?
Here is where I am laying in bed.
Later, here is at the market.
Then, here becomes a dentist’s office.
Here seems to be changing constantly.
Here I’m sitting cross-legged, here I am standing, here I am walking.
Every moment here seems to be somewhere else, but here never really changes.
Here, present, now.
Nothing not here.
Just here.
Just this.
Only here.
Never to be anywhere else.
I can’t get away from here.
I try to be somewhere else, but I’m still here.
I leave and yet here follows.
I’m momentarily lost. Where am I?
I’m still here I just wasn’t looking.
I can’t get out of here. I can’t escape here. I’m eternally here.
I always thought I was going somewhere.
Now I know I’ll never get there.
Here is the only place on earth, and everything happens here.
Where else would I want to be?
Where else could I be?
We’re in the same here.
Together and here.
That’s where we’ve always been.
You seem to be way over there, but you’re still here.
Even when you’re not around, you’re still here.
My here, your here, our here, only one here.
Where is here?
Here is where I am laying in bed.
Later, here is at the market.
Then, here becomes a dentist’s office.
Here seems to be changing constantly.
Here I’m sitting cross-legged, here I am standing, here I am walking.
Every moment here seems to be somewhere else, but here never really changes.
Here, present, now.
Nothing not here.
Just here.
Just this.
Only here.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Trying to Make Sense of It All
Hey Guys,
For many of us, Autumn is approaching as the northern half of the planet begins to seemingly tilt away from the sun. The Fall Equinox is about a week away, and change is much more noticeable as days shorten, temperatures cool and leaves begin to fall. Change is constant, but one thing remains the same, and that reliable constancy is what most of us are all looking for in order to feel safe and secure.
I’ve written a bit about how we tend to go about finding that one constant truth a bit before, but this writing came out of a recent discussion regarding the analytical approach to truth seeking. Being a very analytical person myself, it was fairly easy to analyze the process of analysis ;)
Definitions:
Reduction - Latin - To lead back, or bring down the size, quantity, value or intensity of something
Deduction - Latin - To move away from, or infer from a general principle
Words at their very basic level are vibrations of the vocal chords that we ascribe meaning to. Each vibratory noise has a definition, typically one that has been agreed upon by those in a given society who speak a common language. If you believe in evolution, then it’s safe to say that millions of years ago words began to form as a necessary part of human survival and development. As the human species began to migrate, so did different languages. I have no idea how the evolution of languages (much less dialects) really happened, but it is certainly a fascinating area to explore.
An interesting thing about language is that most words not only have an accepted dictionary definition, but are also accompanied by a mental image. That mental image usually varies from person to person, and is unique to his or her upbringing – cultural, parental, educational, etc. From that perspective it could be said that no two people “see” anything the same way since everything we see or experience is filtered through, and interpreted by, our personal grasp of language. For example, say the word “tree” and a mental image pops up of something, whether it is a generic tree or a specific tree, its setting is going to look different from the image that comes to mind for anyone else. As far as I can tell, the same is true for most words in our language.
So, what does this mean? It means that we are all seeing the world as one big run on definition, which we tend to assume is the same as everyone else’s run on definition. Then, when we encounter someone who has a different definition of something, we think they are wrong. Why wouldn’t we? After all, we have spent our entire lives determining which definitions are true and which aren’t by using language to define the world and ourselves.
How did we determine what’s true and what’s not? How did we go about figuring out this whole ball of wax? I would suggest it’s been through a process of reduction and deduction. First, we reduce the Universe into manageable concepts. It seems too much to take in as it is, so we organize it using words and categories, which formulate the foundation of our beliefs about the world. Instead of seeing shapes and colors, we learn to see things as distinct objects with names and characteristics. This starts when we are very young as our parents introduce us to the world we inhabit, and it is absolutely necessary for our growth and survival.
As we reduce the world out there into digestible ideas, we use those ideas to learn more about how the world works, and how we fit into it. In order to do that, we make deductions based on a combination of our acquired concepts and experiences (i.e. everything we have ever said, done, read, heard, seen, etc.). We combine our definitions with our experiences, and use them to determine what the world is really about. It would seem we are hard wired to desire knowing the truth, even if it’s only a relative truth.
Therefore, we reduce the whole into parts, then deduce or infer from our knowledge of those parts in an attempt to know the whole. So what happened to the whole that we had to reduce to find out what’s true and what’s not? We stripped it of its wholeness, then rebuilt it using words that someone handed us with attached definitions, which we assumed to be accurate. It’s still whole, we’re just not seeing it that way any more. We’re stuck seeing our interpretations of it.
So, if our desire to know the truth is indeed instinctual, we go about trying to find the whole again (i.e. truth) with our filtered and diluted deductions about the world. We’ve broken it down, then built it back up, but can never completely rebuild it. It’s like a jigsaw puzzle of the Universe where pieces are missing – we are constantly running into gaps as we try to rebuild it.
When we run across an area where a piece is missing, we either fill it in by deduction (cutting a piece to fit), or just forget about it and leave it blank. But, no matter how hard we try, we’ll never get an accurate view by using what we’ve learned. That’s why it’s said that discovering the truth involves unlearning what we think we know, and a surrendering of our preconceived ideas, beliefs, and opinions.
Our ability to parse environmental data and extrapolate that information to reach certain conclusions about the inner workings of the world is a wonderful gift. The mind is a very powerful tool, and all you have to do is look around to see examples of how well it has served the evolution of the world we live in. All of the modern technology we take for granted (i.e. the wheel, indoor plumbing, electricity, atom bombs, iPods, etc.), we owe to the incredible power of the mind. But it’s important to realize that it has an equally destructive side to it that has resulted in hundreds of years of war and suffering.
However, if you look you will see that most of the mind’s energy is wasted on trivial matters: dwelling on past conversations, speculating on future encounters, wondering what others think of us, passing judgment, singing a song you can’t get out of your head, etc. Here’s a quote from Gina Lake’s book “Radical Happiness.”
“We need the mind to function, but it is also full of useless and incorrect information – conditioning – that passes as facts. We need the aspect of the mind that allows us to do mental work, but we don’t actually need the egoic mind to function. Self-realization entails a certain mastery of the mind that includes being aware of our thoughts and being able to discriminate between ones that have some truth and usefulness and ones that don’t.”
Finding the truth involves finding who we were before we “knew” everything. That’s why the present moment is the key. Without past everything becomes new again, just like when we were infants looking at this world in a state of awe. Katie Davis says it well in her book “Awake Joy” – “When you are free of past mental images, you recognize that the world is created new every moment that you become aware of it.”
That new and mysterious world is staring you in the face 24 hours a day, and has been all along. Do you want to see it for what it truly is? You have to be willing to set aside everything you hold true. Drop all of your labels and look at what’s in front of you right now.
Peace,
Trey
P.S.
Here’s a parting quote from Eckhart Tolle’s book “Stillness Speaks” – “When you perceive without interpretation, you can then sense what it is that is perceiving. The most we can say in language is that there is a field of alert stillness in which the perception happens. Through “you,” formless consciousness has become aware of itself.”
For many of us, Autumn is approaching as the northern half of the planet begins to seemingly tilt away from the sun. The Fall Equinox is about a week away, and change is much more noticeable as days shorten, temperatures cool and leaves begin to fall. Change is constant, but one thing remains the same, and that reliable constancy is what most of us are all looking for in order to feel safe and secure.
I’ve written a bit about how we tend to go about finding that one constant truth a bit before, but this writing came out of a recent discussion regarding the analytical approach to truth seeking. Being a very analytical person myself, it was fairly easy to analyze the process of analysis ;)
Definitions:
Reduction - Latin - To lead back, or bring down the size, quantity, value or intensity of something
Deduction - Latin - To move away from, or infer from a general principle
Words at their very basic level are vibrations of the vocal chords that we ascribe meaning to. Each vibratory noise has a definition, typically one that has been agreed upon by those in a given society who speak a common language. If you believe in evolution, then it’s safe to say that millions of years ago words began to form as a necessary part of human survival and development. As the human species began to migrate, so did different languages. I have no idea how the evolution of languages (much less dialects) really happened, but it is certainly a fascinating area to explore.
An interesting thing about language is that most words not only have an accepted dictionary definition, but are also accompanied by a mental image. That mental image usually varies from person to person, and is unique to his or her upbringing – cultural, parental, educational, etc. From that perspective it could be said that no two people “see” anything the same way since everything we see or experience is filtered through, and interpreted by, our personal grasp of language. For example, say the word “tree” and a mental image pops up of something, whether it is a generic tree or a specific tree, its setting is going to look different from the image that comes to mind for anyone else. As far as I can tell, the same is true for most words in our language.
So, what does this mean? It means that we are all seeing the world as one big run on definition, which we tend to assume is the same as everyone else’s run on definition. Then, when we encounter someone who has a different definition of something, we think they are wrong. Why wouldn’t we? After all, we have spent our entire lives determining which definitions are true and which aren’t by using language to define the world and ourselves.
How did we determine what’s true and what’s not? How did we go about figuring out this whole ball of wax? I would suggest it’s been through a process of reduction and deduction. First, we reduce the Universe into manageable concepts. It seems too much to take in as it is, so we organize it using words and categories, which formulate the foundation of our beliefs about the world. Instead of seeing shapes and colors, we learn to see things as distinct objects with names and characteristics. This starts when we are very young as our parents introduce us to the world we inhabit, and it is absolutely necessary for our growth and survival.
As we reduce the world out there into digestible ideas, we use those ideas to learn more about how the world works, and how we fit into it. In order to do that, we make deductions based on a combination of our acquired concepts and experiences (i.e. everything we have ever said, done, read, heard, seen, etc.). We combine our definitions with our experiences, and use them to determine what the world is really about. It would seem we are hard wired to desire knowing the truth, even if it’s only a relative truth.
Therefore, we reduce the whole into parts, then deduce or infer from our knowledge of those parts in an attempt to know the whole. So what happened to the whole that we had to reduce to find out what’s true and what’s not? We stripped it of its wholeness, then rebuilt it using words that someone handed us with attached definitions, which we assumed to be accurate. It’s still whole, we’re just not seeing it that way any more. We’re stuck seeing our interpretations of it.
So, if our desire to know the truth is indeed instinctual, we go about trying to find the whole again (i.e. truth) with our filtered and diluted deductions about the world. We’ve broken it down, then built it back up, but can never completely rebuild it. It’s like a jigsaw puzzle of the Universe where pieces are missing – we are constantly running into gaps as we try to rebuild it.
When we run across an area where a piece is missing, we either fill it in by deduction (cutting a piece to fit), or just forget about it and leave it blank. But, no matter how hard we try, we’ll never get an accurate view by using what we’ve learned. That’s why it’s said that discovering the truth involves unlearning what we think we know, and a surrendering of our preconceived ideas, beliefs, and opinions.
Our ability to parse environmental data and extrapolate that information to reach certain conclusions about the inner workings of the world is a wonderful gift. The mind is a very powerful tool, and all you have to do is look around to see examples of how well it has served the evolution of the world we live in. All of the modern technology we take for granted (i.e. the wheel, indoor plumbing, electricity, atom bombs, iPods, etc.), we owe to the incredible power of the mind. But it’s important to realize that it has an equally destructive side to it that has resulted in hundreds of years of war and suffering.
However, if you look you will see that most of the mind’s energy is wasted on trivial matters: dwelling on past conversations, speculating on future encounters, wondering what others think of us, passing judgment, singing a song you can’t get out of your head, etc. Here’s a quote from Gina Lake’s book “Radical Happiness.”
“We need the mind to function, but it is also full of useless and incorrect information – conditioning – that passes as facts. We need the aspect of the mind that allows us to do mental work, but we don’t actually need the egoic mind to function. Self-realization entails a certain mastery of the mind that includes being aware of our thoughts and being able to discriminate between ones that have some truth and usefulness and ones that don’t.”
Finding the truth involves finding who we were before we “knew” everything. That’s why the present moment is the key. Without past everything becomes new again, just like when we were infants looking at this world in a state of awe. Katie Davis says it well in her book “Awake Joy” – “When you are free of past mental images, you recognize that the world is created new every moment that you become aware of it.”
That new and mysterious world is staring you in the face 24 hours a day, and has been all along. Do you want to see it for what it truly is? You have to be willing to set aside everything you hold true. Drop all of your labels and look at what’s in front of you right now.
Peace,
Trey
P.S.
Here’s a parting quote from Eckhart Tolle’s book “Stillness Speaks” – “When you perceive without interpretation, you can then sense what it is that is perceiving. The most we can say in language is that there is a field of alert stillness in which the perception happens. Through “you,” formless consciousness has become aware of itself.”
Friday, July 30, 2010
Spiritual Correctness
I hope you all are doing well and enjoying the Summer heat. Enjoy it while it lasts ;)
I've been sitting on this blog post for a while now. It's created a bottle neck effect on the other ones that want to push through and be shared, so I had to get it off my chest, so to speak.
I have found myself at a bit of a crossroads lately. I’ve written quite a bit on the subject of “enlightenment” over the last few years, much of it representing where I envisioned readers to be on their own path, which has also reflected where I have been on mine. However, I have tried to avoid certain ideas that might turn some people off. As I ran across quotes and insights, each one was instantly judged based on how useful it would be for my projected audience. As time went on, I found myself revising my writing more and more to make the message more palatable for the potential readers in my mind. All of this has become much more noticeable of late, which makes me think I used to be less concerned about how my message was received than I am now.
The Internet has increased the exposure of my writing, and its potential circle of influence and exposure. The potential audience has now diversified and left me a bit uncertain as to who will be reading these words. Will it be spiritual adepts, teachers, critics, or will it be the curious and beginning seekers (which seems to be mainly who I have had in mind when I write)? Is it possible to write something that resonates with everyone? Whose needs am I trying to appeal to anyway?
Up until now, I have had a “known” audience of about 90 people on an email list comprised of friends, family, and acquaintances, plus a blog. So, I have written with many of those people in mind. Now, there are online discussion groups popping up all over for Truth seeking people and those interested in enlightenment. There are a lot of people out there, such as myself, who have a very firm grasp on the ideas surrounding enlightenment. They have it all figured out on an intellectual level, have had a few awakening experiences, and want to tell people how it is. I’m no different, but I am not one to debate another on what’s true and what’s not (at least not openly ;), but that’s what I have seen in some of these online discussion forums.
There are those people drawn to these discussion groups wanting more insights from fellow seekers or teachers. Then there are others who seem to have all the answers, while others who disagree and point out inconsistencies in what someone else has said. Ultimately they are all saying what’s true for them and disagreeing with someone else who doesn’t see things the same way. In many cases it’s a philosophical debate over semantics among egos about Oneness.
After seeing this a couple of times, I decided these groups weren’t for me. Obviously there is no harm in a friendly debate, which is what these tend to be. But if I don’t resonate with what’s being said on a deep level, then it’s just brain candy and fodder for the ego. Having said that, I have benefitted from this ego fodder because it has pointed out my own judgments I have about people, but that’s a different story.
I have found online discussion forums that are a bit more structured, which involve an actual teacher answering questions, that serves members well. A spiritual teacher who is willing to foster and facilitate online discussions is a wonderful thing. Not only is it enlightening, but it prevents endless debates from arising, and actually points readers toward what lies underneath the words.
As for me, there is nothing I can say that is actually true (except for maybe what I just said). However, I am finding myself projecting out my own insecurities, being careful not to say something that an imaginary spiritual critic might take issue with. Basically, my ego is trying to protect itself from criticism by censoring what it says. The increasing tendency to revise is how its desire for praise is manifested. This is very interesting to notice and acknowledge, so I felt compelled to share it.
Of course, this idea filtering has been going on all along, I just happen to be noticing it more and more these days. Much of what I have written has been written with specific people (or types of people) in mind, and my perception of how my message would be received by those people based on my story of them. I have avoided using many terms and phrases that I thought might alienate those with only a mild curiosity, or those who still have firm beliefs. I would prefer to tone it down a bit rather than cause a mind to close down by stepping on a sacred cow (so to speak).
My intention has always been to spark interest in those who have accepted simply being content with life, rather than search for that unadulterated joy that’s at their fingertips. That joy is what we are all searching for, and I want everyone to know that it is attainable at this very moment. This is something that everyone should know.
Now that I am becoming connected with more and more people via Facebook, I am feeling a bit more pressured to watch what I say. There is great potential here to reach hundreds of people with tiny bits of wisdom that might resonate with someone who had no interest in the idea of enlightenment before. I think the key is not to make broad sweeping statements as an authority figure (i.e. “This is how it is.”), but instead scatter ideas or questions that might spark interest.
It’s yet another example of how I have been living my life. I find my actions governed by what I think “so and so” will think about such actions or words. It’s been that way all along and I’m seeing it for what it is more clearly now – protection of the ego. At this point I feel it’s time to be a bit more free with my words, with less concern about how the imagined world perceives them to be. I can learn more about myself by seeing the “me” in “you” anyway ;)
Peace,
Trey
I've been sitting on this blog post for a while now. It's created a bottle neck effect on the other ones that want to push through and be shared, so I had to get it off my chest, so to speak.
I have found myself at a bit of a crossroads lately. I’ve written quite a bit on the subject of “enlightenment” over the last few years, much of it representing where I envisioned readers to be on their own path, which has also reflected where I have been on mine. However, I have tried to avoid certain ideas that might turn some people off. As I ran across quotes and insights, each one was instantly judged based on how useful it would be for my projected audience. As time went on, I found myself revising my writing more and more to make the message more palatable for the potential readers in my mind. All of this has become much more noticeable of late, which makes me think I used to be less concerned about how my message was received than I am now.
The Internet has increased the exposure of my writing, and its potential circle of influence and exposure. The potential audience has now diversified and left me a bit uncertain as to who will be reading these words. Will it be spiritual adepts, teachers, critics, or will it be the curious and beginning seekers (which seems to be mainly who I have had in mind when I write)? Is it possible to write something that resonates with everyone? Whose needs am I trying to appeal to anyway?
Up until now, I have had a “known” audience of about 90 people on an email list comprised of friends, family, and acquaintances, plus a blog. So, I have written with many of those people in mind. Now, there are online discussion groups popping up all over for Truth seeking people and those interested in enlightenment. There are a lot of people out there, such as myself, who have a very firm grasp on the ideas surrounding enlightenment. They have it all figured out on an intellectual level, have had a few awakening experiences, and want to tell people how it is. I’m no different, but I am not one to debate another on what’s true and what’s not (at least not openly ;), but that’s what I have seen in some of these online discussion forums.
There are those people drawn to these discussion groups wanting more insights from fellow seekers or teachers. Then there are others who seem to have all the answers, while others who disagree and point out inconsistencies in what someone else has said. Ultimately they are all saying what’s true for them and disagreeing with someone else who doesn’t see things the same way. In many cases it’s a philosophical debate over semantics among egos about Oneness.
After seeing this a couple of times, I decided these groups weren’t for me. Obviously there is no harm in a friendly debate, which is what these tend to be. But if I don’t resonate with what’s being said on a deep level, then it’s just brain candy and fodder for the ego. Having said that, I have benefitted from this ego fodder because it has pointed out my own judgments I have about people, but that’s a different story.
I have found online discussion forums that are a bit more structured, which involve an actual teacher answering questions, that serves members well. A spiritual teacher who is willing to foster and facilitate online discussions is a wonderful thing. Not only is it enlightening, but it prevents endless debates from arising, and actually points readers toward what lies underneath the words.
As for me, there is nothing I can say that is actually true (except for maybe what I just said). However, I am finding myself projecting out my own insecurities, being careful not to say something that an imaginary spiritual critic might take issue with. Basically, my ego is trying to protect itself from criticism by censoring what it says. The increasing tendency to revise is how its desire for praise is manifested. This is very interesting to notice and acknowledge, so I felt compelled to share it.
Of course, this idea filtering has been going on all along, I just happen to be noticing it more and more these days. Much of what I have written has been written with specific people (or types of people) in mind, and my perception of how my message would be received by those people based on my story of them. I have avoided using many terms and phrases that I thought might alienate those with only a mild curiosity, or those who still have firm beliefs. I would prefer to tone it down a bit rather than cause a mind to close down by stepping on a sacred cow (so to speak).
My intention has always been to spark interest in those who have accepted simply being content with life, rather than search for that unadulterated joy that’s at their fingertips. That joy is what we are all searching for, and I want everyone to know that it is attainable at this very moment. This is something that everyone should know.
Now that I am becoming connected with more and more people via Facebook, I am feeling a bit more pressured to watch what I say. There is great potential here to reach hundreds of people with tiny bits of wisdom that might resonate with someone who had no interest in the idea of enlightenment before. I think the key is not to make broad sweeping statements as an authority figure (i.e. “This is how it is.”), but instead scatter ideas or questions that might spark interest.
It’s yet another example of how I have been living my life. I find my actions governed by what I think “so and so” will think about such actions or words. It’s been that way all along and I’m seeing it for what it is more clearly now – protection of the ego. At this point I feel it’s time to be a bit more free with my words, with less concern about how the imagined world perceives them to be. I can learn more about myself by seeing the “me” in “you” anyway ;)
Peace,
Trey
Saturday, February 06, 2010
A Dream Come True
Here's something I invite you to ponder.
What if this moment was what you had been hoping and praying for all of your life? No matter what you are doing, whether it be taxes or walking the dog or looking at a computer screen, imagine what it would be like if this was your dream come true. Don’t get hung up on the skeptical thoughts, just feel what it feels like to have your hopes and prayers finally be answered. What does that feel like? Experience it fully and deeply – This is it! I finally made it! It’s what I have always needed! Allow yourself to smile :-)
Pause to feel it........
I suggest you do this periodically throughout the day. When you are feeling a bit bored or frustrated, stop and imagine that you have finally achieved your life’s purpose. Sit with the feeling for a minute – This negative situation is actually what I have always wanted, but I decided to call it negative for some reason. This situation is the perfection I’ve been seeking all of my life. My life is now completely fulfilled.
Notice how the mind says, “Yes, but I don’t want this. This is a lie.” It may think what you’re experiencing is painful, or wrong, or mundane, but what if your mind is actually what’s wrong? See what happens if you ignore your doubts and concentrate on the feeling of, “Yes! This is what I have always wanted! My whole life has led up to this incredible moment!” Remember to smile and breath a sigh of relief. Laugh if you feel like it :-D
Pause to feel it........
That feeling you feel of fulfillment and joy and peace is actually available to you at anytime. What brings it about is not the situation, but the acceptance of the situation as being the necessary unraveling of your life situation. This peace sets in when you finally give up your desire to be at peace. You are always at peace, but you’re too busy searching for it to notice.
When the seeking subsides, peace and joy can finally shine through. This is actually your true nature, and you can experience it every moment of everyday if you are open to it. All you have to do is realize that all of your dreams have come true. As you do this more and more, the gratitude that comes from that realization will begin to creep into your daily routine because it wants to be free. It wants you to notice. It wants you to realize the joy that you already are, and have always been.
In gratitude,
Trey
What if this moment was what you had been hoping and praying for all of your life? No matter what you are doing, whether it be taxes or walking the dog or looking at a computer screen, imagine what it would be like if this was your dream come true. Don’t get hung up on the skeptical thoughts, just feel what it feels like to have your hopes and prayers finally be answered. What does that feel like? Experience it fully and deeply – This is it! I finally made it! It’s what I have always needed! Allow yourself to smile :-)
Pause to feel it........
I suggest you do this periodically throughout the day. When you are feeling a bit bored or frustrated, stop and imagine that you have finally achieved your life’s purpose. Sit with the feeling for a minute – This negative situation is actually what I have always wanted, but I decided to call it negative for some reason. This situation is the perfection I’ve been seeking all of my life. My life is now completely fulfilled.
Notice how the mind says, “Yes, but I don’t want this. This is a lie.” It may think what you’re experiencing is painful, or wrong, or mundane, but what if your mind is actually what’s wrong? See what happens if you ignore your doubts and concentrate on the feeling of, “Yes! This is what I have always wanted! My whole life has led up to this incredible moment!” Remember to smile and breath a sigh of relief. Laugh if you feel like it :-D
Pause to feel it........
That feeling you feel of fulfillment and joy and peace is actually available to you at anytime. What brings it about is not the situation, but the acceptance of the situation as being the necessary unraveling of your life situation. This peace sets in when you finally give up your desire to be at peace. You are always at peace, but you’re too busy searching for it to notice.
When the seeking subsides, peace and joy can finally shine through. This is actually your true nature, and you can experience it every moment of everyday if you are open to it. All you have to do is realize that all of your dreams have come true. As you do this more and more, the gratitude that comes from that realization will begin to creep into your daily routine because it wants to be free. It wants you to notice. It wants you to realize the joy that you already are, and have always been.
In gratitude,
Trey
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Why Ask Why?
Over the past few years (since around 2006 or so), I have been in an off and on state of mentally describing my discoveries on the topic of enlightenment, or awakening, or self-realization, or whatever word turns you on the most. I have found that as I begin to see through the illusory nature of the world, I begin to mentally talk about it. The mental movement comes from the idea or feeling that “This must be shared,” which is something I’m sure I’ve shared with you before.
This compulsion to share can be frustrating if looked as a mental distraction that perpetuates the ego, or it can be seen as a gift in disguise. Something has been driving me, to share these things with everyone I know. Mental notes to describe insights happen anyway, so why not just accept it and share them? They obviously want to be shared.
On some level, this sharing has been my life’s purpose for some time now. However, I’m not really the one doing the sharing and they’re not really my words. I am a pawn in the game of life being used to help other pawns realize their true nature. But that’s easy to loose sight of when you are still grappling with ego, and so the story of being the doer continues.
Recently it occurred to me that my desire to share insights with others might actually be a veiled form of resistence, or a desire for things to be different from the way they are. My desire would be for “my” words to intensify “your” desire to awaken. “I” desire for “you” to be different from the way “you” are (i.e. more enlightened). However, by doing The Work on this idea it becomes obvious that it’s actually “me” that I want to be different. After all, “you” are a mirror of what’s going on in “me” and are reflecting my own non-acceptance of who I am.
From that perspective there seems to be two movements going on – there is the desire for you/me to be different, as well as a compulsion to share things that might make a difference. Which comes first? Is it possible that the compulsion is always happening and that I am imposing the idea that it might be happening out of a desire for change? Or, do I want change so badly that I am driven to pass on pertinent information in hopes of bringing about that change? Are they really separate? Does it matter? Either way Life is living me and this mental dialogue is another way in which the mind likes to do what it does best – analyze the hell out of things.
I can spend my time trying to find answers, or I can spend my time trying to find the truth. The truth is that which has no answers. The truth is that which can’t be put into words. It’s the desireless state of full acceptance of what is. It’s unconditional love. What’s going on in our lives is exactly what needs to be going on in our lives. The life situation is an ongoing invitation for us to wake up out of the dream of being trapped inside a body with all of the problems that go with being trapped inside a body. Acceptance, not analysis, is key to self-realization.
With the idea in mind that everything happens a reason, there is a natural tendency to look at things that happen and search for specifics as to what it is life is actually trying to tell me. The situation can be looked at under a microscope for traces of answers that will satisfy the mind, or simply accepted as part of the play of life. So, why ask why, when you can ask who am I?
Peace,
Trey
This compulsion to share can be frustrating if looked as a mental distraction that perpetuates the ego, or it can be seen as a gift in disguise. Something has been driving me, to share these things with everyone I know. Mental notes to describe insights happen anyway, so why not just accept it and share them? They obviously want to be shared.
On some level, this sharing has been my life’s purpose for some time now. However, I’m not really the one doing the sharing and they’re not really my words. I am a pawn in the game of life being used to help other pawns realize their true nature. But that’s easy to loose sight of when you are still grappling with ego, and so the story of being the doer continues.
Recently it occurred to me that my desire to share insights with others might actually be a veiled form of resistence, or a desire for things to be different from the way they are. My desire would be for “my” words to intensify “your” desire to awaken. “I” desire for “you” to be different from the way “you” are (i.e. more enlightened). However, by doing The Work on this idea it becomes obvious that it’s actually “me” that I want to be different. After all, “you” are a mirror of what’s going on in “me” and are reflecting my own non-acceptance of who I am.
From that perspective there seems to be two movements going on – there is the desire for you/me to be different, as well as a compulsion to share things that might make a difference. Which comes first? Is it possible that the compulsion is always happening and that I am imposing the idea that it might be happening out of a desire for change? Or, do I want change so badly that I am driven to pass on pertinent information in hopes of bringing about that change? Are they really separate? Does it matter? Either way Life is living me and this mental dialogue is another way in which the mind likes to do what it does best – analyze the hell out of things.
I can spend my time trying to find answers, or I can spend my time trying to find the truth. The truth is that which has no answers. The truth is that which can’t be put into words. It’s the desireless state of full acceptance of what is. It’s unconditional love. What’s going on in our lives is exactly what needs to be going on in our lives. The life situation is an ongoing invitation for us to wake up out of the dream of being trapped inside a body with all of the problems that go with being trapped inside a body. Acceptance, not analysis, is key to self-realization.
With the idea in mind that everything happens a reason, there is a natural tendency to look at things that happen and search for specifics as to what it is life is actually trying to tell me. The situation can be looked at under a microscope for traces of answers that will satisfy the mind, or simply accepted as part of the play of life. So, why ask why, when you can ask who am I?
Peace,
Trey
Saturday, December 26, 2009
It All Starts With Mindfulness
I took a bit of a break from writing between March and November. I felt a need to wind down a bit. That’s due in part to a feeling of, “What more is there to say?” Anything I said would just be a repeat of something that’s already been said. But I have benefitted greatly from re-reading the same thing at a later date, as well as reading the same thing stated a different way. Plus, technically there is nothing “new” about anything I’ve said so far. So, I decided to start putting ideas on digital paper again and ended up at the beginning again – mindfulness.
If you want to live a better life, filled with less stress and anxiety, it’s really quite simple. It all begins with mindfulness. The ability to notice what’s going on in the mind and body is crucial, and also takes practice. We can’t really control our thoughts because they have a mind of their own (no pun intended). What we can do is take a step back from our thoughts and witness their redundant, incessant, and often trivial activities.
Anyone can notice what thoughts they are thinking at any moment in time just by “looking.” One way to start out might be to deliberately think thoughts, or mentally recite something while you watch the thoughts happen. There are your thoughts, and here you are, witnessing them. I recommend you do this as often as possible with your everyday thoughts since mindfulness creates a solid foundation for a better life.
If you want to take mindfulness to the next level, you can “look” at who or what is witnessing these thoughts. “Who am I,” is the basic question to ask over and over again, while continuing to direct your attention toward the witness behind your thoughts. However, that is a topic for another discussion, and I think most people start out just practicing mindfulness on a more personal level, focusing attention on their life situation.
On that more personal level of mindfulness, you can really learn a lot about yourself when you watch how you think in different situations. I have found it immensely helpful to have read books by Eckhart Tolle and Byron Katie because they have helped point out specific repetitive thought structures that most of us have going all the time, as well as their adverse affect on our state of being. In fact, I wouldn’t even know that these thoughts were going on, much less that they were at the root of my problems, had it not been for these great teachers. Simply knowing that thoughts prevent us from seeing the beauty all around is an idea that encourages us to get out of our heads and to wake up.
There are a few basic kernels of wisdom that I have found helpful to keep in mind while being mindful. I am not my thoughts. I can’t control my thoughts, but I can observe them. My thoughts only represent my past conditioning. When I feel worried, I realize that I am mentally living in an imagined future. Life is my mirror, and when I think negatively of another, it is actually me I am thinking negatively of. I forgive easily and forget quickly.
If someone lashes out at me, rather than react, I try to notice what thoughts or emotions are triggered. In most cases, no reaction is better than any action at all. I recognize that I am not the cause of their upset, nor they of mine. Past conditioning and mental stories are the actual culprits. When I do notice resentment, I bring myself back to the present moment, realizing that, in reality, the past never really happened. I am the only one keeping it alive with my thoughts. Plus, since no two people see anything the same way, the past I’m feeding is completely different from that of another.
Feelings of conflict or stress can serve as a reminder to notice what thoughts are doing to me. Since negativity always stems from some sort of judgment, it helps to mentally do The Work (by Byron Katie) throughout the day. When I find myself lost in compulsive and repetitive thought, I notice the frustration that can cause, then try to bring attention back to what I am doing at this moment and give it my full attention.
The thing I’ve noticed about being mindful, and the knowledge I’ve gained from looking at my reactive nature, is that the movement of mind is very subtle. My ability to notice when I feel defensive has improved dramatically, and there is much less stress and conflict in my life. But, this can make it more disturbing when conflict does occur. A feeling of frustration or disappointment is often present after a stressful moment has occurred. A feeling is like a hidden thought that is not in words but felt in the body, and is sometimes more difficult to notice. If investigated, I find that this negative feeling might stem from thoughts like: “I should know better,” or “ When will I realize that my thoughts just a result of past conditioning?” or “ Why can’t I recognize that I am the only cause of conflict in my life?” or “ When will I be free of compulsive thinking?”
All of these questions are simply forms of self-judgment that can carry us away into a story of lack and insufficiency if left unchecked. It helps me when I notice these thoughts or feelings of self-judgment to remember the necessity of all things. For example, it is necessary for me to feel or experience such thoughts in order to point out hidden pockets of resistance. It is my challenge to be made aware of my resistance to what is, then accept what is (even if I am accepting my own lack of acceptance). What I experience is what I need to experience, even if it doesn’t feel all that pleasant. Accepting one’s own failure to live up to some mind created standard is a practice that grows easier with continuous self-observation. As a result, failure is seen as success in spotting the falseness of the mind created standard.
This is all part of a gradual Awakening. Life just gets better as we release old habits and ways of thinking. The past we drag around with us seems to get heavier as we go, but it has always been heavy. We are just starting to realize just how heavy it really is. Mindfulness is at the root of lightening the load.
Peace,
Trey
If you want to live a better life, filled with less stress and anxiety, it’s really quite simple. It all begins with mindfulness. The ability to notice what’s going on in the mind and body is crucial, and also takes practice. We can’t really control our thoughts because they have a mind of their own (no pun intended). What we can do is take a step back from our thoughts and witness their redundant, incessant, and often trivial activities.
Anyone can notice what thoughts they are thinking at any moment in time just by “looking.” One way to start out might be to deliberately think thoughts, or mentally recite something while you watch the thoughts happen. There are your thoughts, and here you are, witnessing them. I recommend you do this as often as possible with your everyday thoughts since mindfulness creates a solid foundation for a better life.
If you want to take mindfulness to the next level, you can “look” at who or what is witnessing these thoughts. “Who am I,” is the basic question to ask over and over again, while continuing to direct your attention toward the witness behind your thoughts. However, that is a topic for another discussion, and I think most people start out just practicing mindfulness on a more personal level, focusing attention on their life situation.
On that more personal level of mindfulness, you can really learn a lot about yourself when you watch how you think in different situations. I have found it immensely helpful to have read books by Eckhart Tolle and Byron Katie because they have helped point out specific repetitive thought structures that most of us have going all the time, as well as their adverse affect on our state of being. In fact, I wouldn’t even know that these thoughts were going on, much less that they were at the root of my problems, had it not been for these great teachers. Simply knowing that thoughts prevent us from seeing the beauty all around is an idea that encourages us to get out of our heads and to wake up.
There are a few basic kernels of wisdom that I have found helpful to keep in mind while being mindful. I am not my thoughts. I can’t control my thoughts, but I can observe them. My thoughts only represent my past conditioning. When I feel worried, I realize that I am mentally living in an imagined future. Life is my mirror, and when I think negatively of another, it is actually me I am thinking negatively of. I forgive easily and forget quickly.
If someone lashes out at me, rather than react, I try to notice what thoughts or emotions are triggered. In most cases, no reaction is better than any action at all. I recognize that I am not the cause of their upset, nor they of mine. Past conditioning and mental stories are the actual culprits. When I do notice resentment, I bring myself back to the present moment, realizing that, in reality, the past never really happened. I am the only one keeping it alive with my thoughts. Plus, since no two people see anything the same way, the past I’m feeding is completely different from that of another.
Feelings of conflict or stress can serve as a reminder to notice what thoughts are doing to me. Since negativity always stems from some sort of judgment, it helps to mentally do The Work (by Byron Katie) throughout the day. When I find myself lost in compulsive and repetitive thought, I notice the frustration that can cause, then try to bring attention back to what I am doing at this moment and give it my full attention.
The thing I’ve noticed about being mindful, and the knowledge I’ve gained from looking at my reactive nature, is that the movement of mind is very subtle. My ability to notice when I feel defensive has improved dramatically, and there is much less stress and conflict in my life. But, this can make it more disturbing when conflict does occur. A feeling of frustration or disappointment is often present after a stressful moment has occurred. A feeling is like a hidden thought that is not in words but felt in the body, and is sometimes more difficult to notice. If investigated, I find that this negative feeling might stem from thoughts like: “I should know better,” or “ When will I realize that my thoughts just a result of past conditioning?” or “ Why can’t I recognize that I am the only cause of conflict in my life?” or “ When will I be free of compulsive thinking?”
All of these questions are simply forms of self-judgment that can carry us away into a story of lack and insufficiency if left unchecked. It helps me when I notice these thoughts or feelings of self-judgment to remember the necessity of all things. For example, it is necessary for me to feel or experience such thoughts in order to point out hidden pockets of resistance. It is my challenge to be made aware of my resistance to what is, then accept what is (even if I am accepting my own lack of acceptance). What I experience is what I need to experience, even if it doesn’t feel all that pleasant. Accepting one’s own failure to live up to some mind created standard is a practice that grows easier with continuous self-observation. As a result, failure is seen as success in spotting the falseness of the mind created standard.
This is all part of a gradual Awakening. Life just gets better as we release old habits and ways of thinking. The past we drag around with us seems to get heavier as we go, but it has always been heavy. We are just starting to realize just how heavy it really is. Mindfulness is at the root of lightening the load.
Peace,
Trey
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Happy Thanksgiving
I hope you all are enjoying the change of the seasons. As the leaves fall, the sky gets larger, the nights grow longer. The stars seem brighter and more prevalent, and the outside world becomes more still as the birds and insects disappear. An exciting change is in the air.
Thanksgiving is also upon us. This is one of my favorite holidays because it serves as a reminder to look at all there is to be grateful for. I am grateful for my family and friends, for their love and support. I am grateful that I have come to see how much love there is in the simplest act. I am grateful for this beautiful planet we inhabit. I am grateful for technology that has enabled me to connect with so many people from my past and present.
At the most basic level, I am grateful that I exist. What a miraculous gift! How is it even possible to express enough gratitude for my pure existence? I am also grateful for all of the great teachings that have come into my life, which have led me to appreciate all there is. Everywhere I look I can see things to be grateful for – if I look close enough. I would like to encourage all of you to look at all of the little things there are to be grateful for as well.
Many of us have mixed feelings about coming together with friends and family over the holidays. Some are eager to reunite, and some are a bit reluctant (or a combination of both). It can be a time of stress when it comes to preparations that need to be made. We want everything to be just right. We love it when things go our way. But things don’t always go the way we want, which causes stress. I encourage you to recognize when this happens and be grateful that things are always going exactly the way they are supposed to, whether it coincides with our plans or not. Gratitude is the greatest stress reliever.
If the casserole gets burned, or the turkey gets overcooked, or someone forgets to bring dessert, be grateful. Things have gone exactly as they are supposed to and you’ve been given a great opportunity to realize and appreciate that. If disagreements happen among family members over politics or other family matters, another opportunity for growth has arisen. Once you realize that life could be no other way than it is right now, true forgiveness can occur. When we forgive, gratitude is a natural byproduct. This gratitude stems from not having to bear the heavy burden of resentment and anger. If we recognize that we are acting out of anger or frustration, we can then forgive ourselves and experience the gratitude of being forgiven.
As I was writing this, an Eckhart Tolle quote crossed my path. “Forgiveness happens naturally once you realize that your grievance serves no purpose except to strengthen a false sense of self (ego). Forgiveness is to offer no resistance to life – to allow life to live through you. The alternatives are pain and suffering, a greatly restricted flow of life energy, and in many cases physical disease.”
To truly forgive is to rid yourself of the burdensome weight of the past. Holding on to the past – whether that be 5 minutes ago or 5 years ago – will only lead to more suffering. To forgive and forget is to bring attention back to the only moment we will ever have: Now. Be thankful for Now by recognizing it as the one thing that matters.
Happy Thanksgiving,
Trey
Thanksgiving is also upon us. This is one of my favorite holidays because it serves as a reminder to look at all there is to be grateful for. I am grateful for my family and friends, for their love and support. I am grateful that I have come to see how much love there is in the simplest act. I am grateful for this beautiful planet we inhabit. I am grateful for technology that has enabled me to connect with so many people from my past and present.
At the most basic level, I am grateful that I exist. What a miraculous gift! How is it even possible to express enough gratitude for my pure existence? I am also grateful for all of the great teachings that have come into my life, which have led me to appreciate all there is. Everywhere I look I can see things to be grateful for – if I look close enough. I would like to encourage all of you to look at all of the little things there are to be grateful for as well.
Many of us have mixed feelings about coming together with friends and family over the holidays. Some are eager to reunite, and some are a bit reluctant (or a combination of both). It can be a time of stress when it comes to preparations that need to be made. We want everything to be just right. We love it when things go our way. But things don’t always go the way we want, which causes stress. I encourage you to recognize when this happens and be grateful that things are always going exactly the way they are supposed to, whether it coincides with our plans or not. Gratitude is the greatest stress reliever.
If the casserole gets burned, or the turkey gets overcooked, or someone forgets to bring dessert, be grateful. Things have gone exactly as they are supposed to and you’ve been given a great opportunity to realize and appreciate that. If disagreements happen among family members over politics or other family matters, another opportunity for growth has arisen. Once you realize that life could be no other way than it is right now, true forgiveness can occur. When we forgive, gratitude is a natural byproduct. This gratitude stems from not having to bear the heavy burden of resentment and anger. If we recognize that we are acting out of anger or frustration, we can then forgive ourselves and experience the gratitude of being forgiven.
As I was writing this, an Eckhart Tolle quote crossed my path. “Forgiveness happens naturally once you realize that your grievance serves no purpose except to strengthen a false sense of self (ego). Forgiveness is to offer no resistance to life – to allow life to live through you. The alternatives are pain and suffering, a greatly restricted flow of life energy, and in many cases physical disease.”
To truly forgive is to rid yourself of the burdensome weight of the past. Holding on to the past – whether that be 5 minutes ago or 5 years ago – will only lead to more suffering. To forgive and forget is to bring attention back to the only moment we will ever have: Now. Be thankful for Now by recognizing it as the one thing that matters.
Happy Thanksgiving,
Trey
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Powerful Pointers
Ever since I discovered the idea of enlightenment a couple of years ago, I have felt compelled to find out as much as I could about it. I have been a researcher of sorts, taking in all of these things compiling them, sharing them with others, etc. My intellectual comprehension has continued to deepen, as has my experiential understanding. What I have found quite useful is reading certain things that resonate with me multiple times. I have found that I am not always present enough to hear what is being said the first time. In effect, I may not be ready to hear this now, but may be later. The other benefit to continuing to read about such things is that it serves as a constant reminder to look deeper. Otherwise, you read a book about enlightenment and say, “Well, that’s interesting,” and then leave it at that.
However, it seems to be that we all want the same thing: a sense of peace that is not determined or affected by what the world throws at us. We all want to be happy. So, it seems in order for us to do that, we have to be able to be completely at peace with who we are. How can we be happy when we are playing a role, trying to please others? Why can’t we just be ourselves and not care about pleasing others? What if being ourselves is all it takes to please others? Then we must first recognize who we truly are beyond the roles we have played all of our lives.
Along my personal journey, I have picked up various pointers that have resonated with me. Pointers are wonderful tools that help guide the mind toward what we truly are. We, in effect, use this mind to search for ourselves, but can’t rely on it to understand what we are looking for. Intellectual understanding is great, and I think is a necessary part of finding yourself, but eventually those mental concepts become a hindrance and have to be put aside to make room for the actual experience of what is true.
The pointers I have provided below have helped me bring about the experience of understanding rather than the mental movement of understanding (though both seem to happen). I invite you to experiment with them on your own to see what happens. Try sitting with one pointer, or one sentence of a pointer for a while rather than just give it all a once over and forget about it. You may find that some of them work some of the time and not at others, but I recommend try them all over and over. It might be helpful for you to copy and paste them into a document you can print out for future use, or write some on post it notes to place around as reminders.
Lately I’ve found that the most simple, yet profound, pointers are those that just tell you to look at yourself. In fact, according to John Sherman, if you simply look at yourself as often as you think of it, you are guaranteed to find what you are looking for, which is what you have always been and didn’t realize it ;)
Pointers:
When needless thoughts arise and you notice them, turn them into gibberish or replace them with blah blah blah. Witness the thoughts as they turn into meaninglessness and disappear into silence.
What’s more real, the thoughts in my head, or the fact that I am here? Check in and see.
Simply look at yourself. Not in the mirror. Just look at yourself. Ask yourself, “Who am I?” and follow your attention inward, as if your point of focus has rotated 180 degrees.
Look at who you think you are. Look at your mind made image of yourself, how you see yourself, how you think others see you. What is really there?
Point your finger around at different objects, looking at what it points at along the way. Then point the finger at your own face. Look at what it is pointing at.
Who or what is looking through my eyes? Close your eyes and “look” (or focus your attention) at what’s right behind your eyes.
Focus your attention on your inner body. Feel the life underneath your skin. Feel your breath.
Be still and notice the stillness around you. Listen to the silence underneath the noises you hear.
Focus on the empty space around you. Look around and become aware of the space that encompasses everything.
Think about this: Nothing ever happened. Everything in the past is just your imagination.
There is just this. Just what is in front of you at this moment. The only thing that really exists is just this, only this. Right here, right now.
Look at things for the first time, as if you had never seen them before. Drop your stories and labels and just look through the eyes that don’t know anything. What was it before you knew what it was?
Let it (everything) be, just as it is. Look at the simple isness of it. See it only for what it is. It is simply here, just here, in your presence, and you are aware of it being present.
Look at your hands as they manipulate things. Watch them as they move around with their own innate intelligence. You don’t need to control them, they know what they’re doing. What will they do next? Just witness.
You are not the doer. See what it’s like when you stop pretending to be in control. Just let the body lead the way and see where it takes you.
I am ALWAYS right here. I am, and always have been, aware of my own existence, my here-ness. I am never not aware that I exist. In every circumstance, I am always aware of the space that I am in. The one constant, never changing fact is that I am aware of myself. I am totally conscious (aware) of being here (present) where ever I am. I see that I exist even when I am unaware that I am aware. “I am” even when I don’t know “I am.”
Look at a past memory. What was it that was there witnessing it? What hasn’t changed since then? What has always been there, where every you have been, what ever you have done? You. Your simple “you-ness” has always been present at any given point in your life. Quietly watching your life unfold.
What if this same witnessing presence that looks through your eyes is the same witnessing presence that is looking through everyone else’s eyes? Look around at others as if your witnessing presence is actually the same presence looking through their eyes. In effect, take your awareness and wrap it around behind the eyes of others. The only difference is your outward appearance and your past experiences. You may have different thoughts, but that which is always here for us (our witnessing presence) is the same for all of us.
If I’m asked, “Are you enlightened yet?” I would say, “Yes. I always have been. I just haven’t fully realized it yet.”
Driving (or walking) Meditation:
As you drive down the road (highways and byways where there is not stop and go traffic is best), focus your eyes a slight bit higher, or lower, or to the left or right of where you would typically look. As you do so, open up your field of vision so that you are focusing not just on what is in front of you, but also what is in your peripheral vision. Expand your view so that you are taking in more of the scenery all around rather than just what is right in front of you. Experiment by looking around at different points in front of you (i.e. a little to the left of center, a little above center, etc.). As you do so, remain aware of your peripheral vision. You can simultaneously be aware of what is in front of you and what is all around you. You can enjoy looking at the sky as you drive down the road just with a slight shift in your perspective. Even the lines painted on the road are more alive when they are noticed. Take it all in. Be aware of it.
As you do this, notice if you feel any tension in your body. Relax into it by taking a smiling breath. This is life. It’s always all around you even when you don’t notice. Don’t be afraid to look around when you drive. You don’t even have to turn your head to do it. Surrender to the fact that you don’t have any control over your fate when you get in a car (or in any other circumstance for that matter). There’s nothing to fear if life is giving you everything you need to experience to bring about your own fulfillment. In short, you’re not driving, you’re being driven. Since we’re all on a hunk of rock that’s spinning a thousand miles per hour and hurtling through space at half a million miles per hour, why not sit back and enjoy the ride?
However, it seems to be that we all want the same thing: a sense of peace that is not determined or affected by what the world throws at us. We all want to be happy. So, it seems in order for us to do that, we have to be able to be completely at peace with who we are. How can we be happy when we are playing a role, trying to please others? Why can’t we just be ourselves and not care about pleasing others? What if being ourselves is all it takes to please others? Then we must first recognize who we truly are beyond the roles we have played all of our lives.
Along my personal journey, I have picked up various pointers that have resonated with me. Pointers are wonderful tools that help guide the mind toward what we truly are. We, in effect, use this mind to search for ourselves, but can’t rely on it to understand what we are looking for. Intellectual understanding is great, and I think is a necessary part of finding yourself, but eventually those mental concepts become a hindrance and have to be put aside to make room for the actual experience of what is true.
The pointers I have provided below have helped me bring about the experience of understanding rather than the mental movement of understanding (though both seem to happen). I invite you to experiment with them on your own to see what happens. Try sitting with one pointer, or one sentence of a pointer for a while rather than just give it all a once over and forget about it. You may find that some of them work some of the time and not at others, but I recommend try them all over and over. It might be helpful for you to copy and paste them into a document you can print out for future use, or write some on post it notes to place around as reminders.
Lately I’ve found that the most simple, yet profound, pointers are those that just tell you to look at yourself. In fact, according to John Sherman, if you simply look at yourself as often as you think of it, you are guaranteed to find what you are looking for, which is what you have always been and didn’t realize it ;)
Pointers:
When needless thoughts arise and you notice them, turn them into gibberish or replace them with blah blah blah. Witness the thoughts as they turn into meaninglessness and disappear into silence.
What’s more real, the thoughts in my head, or the fact that I am here? Check in and see.
Simply look at yourself. Not in the mirror. Just look at yourself. Ask yourself, “Who am I?” and follow your attention inward, as if your point of focus has rotated 180 degrees.
Look at who you think you are. Look at your mind made image of yourself, how you see yourself, how you think others see you. What is really there?
Point your finger around at different objects, looking at what it points at along the way. Then point the finger at your own face. Look at what it is pointing at.
Who or what is looking through my eyes? Close your eyes and “look” (or focus your attention) at what’s right behind your eyes.
Focus your attention on your inner body. Feel the life underneath your skin. Feel your breath.
Be still and notice the stillness around you. Listen to the silence underneath the noises you hear.
Focus on the empty space around you. Look around and become aware of the space that encompasses everything.
Think about this: Nothing ever happened. Everything in the past is just your imagination.
There is just this. Just what is in front of you at this moment. The only thing that really exists is just this, only this. Right here, right now.
Look at things for the first time, as if you had never seen them before. Drop your stories and labels and just look through the eyes that don’t know anything. What was it before you knew what it was?
Let it (everything) be, just as it is. Look at the simple isness of it. See it only for what it is. It is simply here, just here, in your presence, and you are aware of it being present.
Look at your hands as they manipulate things. Watch them as they move around with their own innate intelligence. You don’t need to control them, they know what they’re doing. What will they do next? Just witness.
You are not the doer. See what it’s like when you stop pretending to be in control. Just let the body lead the way and see where it takes you.
I am ALWAYS right here. I am, and always have been, aware of my own existence, my here-ness. I am never not aware that I exist. In every circumstance, I am always aware of the space that I am in. The one constant, never changing fact is that I am aware of myself. I am totally conscious (aware) of being here (present) where ever I am. I see that I exist even when I am unaware that I am aware. “I am” even when I don’t know “I am.”
Look at a past memory. What was it that was there witnessing it? What hasn’t changed since then? What has always been there, where every you have been, what ever you have done? You. Your simple “you-ness” has always been present at any given point in your life. Quietly watching your life unfold.
What if this same witnessing presence that looks through your eyes is the same witnessing presence that is looking through everyone else’s eyes? Look around at others as if your witnessing presence is actually the same presence looking through their eyes. In effect, take your awareness and wrap it around behind the eyes of others. The only difference is your outward appearance and your past experiences. You may have different thoughts, but that which is always here for us (our witnessing presence) is the same for all of us.
If I’m asked, “Are you enlightened yet?” I would say, “Yes. I always have been. I just haven’t fully realized it yet.”
Driving (or walking) Meditation:
As you drive down the road (highways and byways where there is not stop and go traffic is best), focus your eyes a slight bit higher, or lower, or to the left or right of where you would typically look. As you do so, open up your field of vision so that you are focusing not just on what is in front of you, but also what is in your peripheral vision. Expand your view so that you are taking in more of the scenery all around rather than just what is right in front of you. Experiment by looking around at different points in front of you (i.e. a little to the left of center, a little above center, etc.). As you do so, remain aware of your peripheral vision. You can simultaneously be aware of what is in front of you and what is all around you. You can enjoy looking at the sky as you drive down the road just with a slight shift in your perspective. Even the lines painted on the road are more alive when they are noticed. Take it all in. Be aware of it.
As you do this, notice if you feel any tension in your body. Relax into it by taking a smiling breath. This is life. It’s always all around you even when you don’t notice. Don’t be afraid to look around when you drive. You don’t even have to turn your head to do it. Surrender to the fact that you don’t have any control over your fate when you get in a car (or in any other circumstance for that matter). There’s nothing to fear if life is giving you everything you need to experience to bring about your own fulfillment. In short, you’re not driving, you’re being driven. Since we’re all on a hunk of rock that’s spinning a thousand miles per hour and hurtling through space at half a million miles per hour, why not sit back and enjoy the ride?
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
25 Things
An interesting little Facebook note came my way asking me to write 25 things about myself and pass it on. I felt that it was an opportunity to share some teachings with people who might never have been exposed to such ideas. It’s mostly a summary of things I have picked up from Eckhart Tolle and Byron Katie. So, here is what I originally wrote (I later went back and made it more of an autobiographical note as the instructions suggested). I will take these ideas to a deeper level in my next post.
1. I like collecting seeds of wisdom and sowing them around the world in an attempt to make it a happier, greener place to live. Take only that which resonates with you and forget the rest.
2. You are not the thinker. Your thoughts are not who you are
3. You are totally at the mercy of life. You don’t live life, it lives you.
4. Believing your thoughts eventually leads to suffering (i.e. boredom, discontentment, complaining, frustration, anger, etc.)
5. Let everything be just as it is, without mental labels
6. Now is all there ever is. Everything happens, and has happened, in the present moment. You are, and always will be, present.
7. Your thoughts create a veil of stories and labels that prevent you from seeing what life truly is
8. Give your fullest attention to what you are doing right now as often as you can
9. Pay attention to the feeling of your inner body, or your breathing, as often as you can
10. Listen to the voice in your head as it talks about everything around you. Know that those thoughts are simply part of your past conditioning and are not who you are. Do not judge yourself for having them. Just notice.
11. Who are you really? If you set aside your mind made identity, what’s left?
12. Everything you have ever experienced was necessary to bring you to where you are now, which is exactly where you are meant to be.
13. Who would you be without your story, without your name, without your history?
14. Look at where your hands are right now. Look at how you are sitting. Did you plan that or was it just a happening?
15. There is my business, their business, and God’s (reality’s) business. If you are in someone else’s business you are not living your life.
16. All of your judgements toward others are actually about you. When you judge someone, look to see if you can find an element of that judgement living within yourself.
17. Everyone, including you, is doing the best they can given their present state of consciousness. If you had lived their life, you would be acting in the same way they are.
18. All war, on a personal and collective level, stems from believing your thoughts to be true
19. What is, is. You can argue with it or accept it.
20. If you can witness your thoughts, then you are obviously not your thoughts. You are actually the witnessing presence behind those thoughts.
21. Pay attention to the empty space that contains all things.
22. Pay attention to the silence underneath the sounds, the silence between words or thoughts.
23. Look at the things in this world as if it was the first time you had ever seen them, as if you had no previous knowledge of what they were. What was it before you knew what it was?
24. Ask yourself “Who am I?” and direct your attention inward. Don’t look for and answer with the mind, just focus your attention at the source of the question. Who is it that asks the question?
25. The story of who you think you are is what prevents you from seeing your true nature as consciousness itself. Awareness is who you are. You have never not been aware.
1. I like collecting seeds of wisdom and sowing them around the world in an attempt to make it a happier, greener place to live. Take only that which resonates with you and forget the rest.
2. You are not the thinker. Your thoughts are not who you are
3. You are totally at the mercy of life. You don’t live life, it lives you.
4. Believing your thoughts eventually leads to suffering (i.e. boredom, discontentment, complaining, frustration, anger, etc.)
5. Let everything be just as it is, without mental labels
6. Now is all there ever is. Everything happens, and has happened, in the present moment. You are, and always will be, present.
7. Your thoughts create a veil of stories and labels that prevent you from seeing what life truly is
8. Give your fullest attention to what you are doing right now as often as you can
9. Pay attention to the feeling of your inner body, or your breathing, as often as you can
10. Listen to the voice in your head as it talks about everything around you. Know that those thoughts are simply part of your past conditioning and are not who you are. Do not judge yourself for having them. Just notice.
11. Who are you really? If you set aside your mind made identity, what’s left?
12. Everything you have ever experienced was necessary to bring you to where you are now, which is exactly where you are meant to be.
13. Who would you be without your story, without your name, without your history?
14. Look at where your hands are right now. Look at how you are sitting. Did you plan that or was it just a happening?
15. There is my business, their business, and God’s (reality’s) business. If you are in someone else’s business you are not living your life.
16. All of your judgements toward others are actually about you. When you judge someone, look to see if you can find an element of that judgement living within yourself.
17. Everyone, including you, is doing the best they can given their present state of consciousness. If you had lived their life, you would be acting in the same way they are.
18. All war, on a personal and collective level, stems from believing your thoughts to be true
19. What is, is. You can argue with it or accept it.
20. If you can witness your thoughts, then you are obviously not your thoughts. You are actually the witnessing presence behind those thoughts.
21. Pay attention to the empty space that contains all things.
22. Pay attention to the silence underneath the sounds, the silence between words or thoughts.
23. Look at the things in this world as if it was the first time you had ever seen them, as if you had no previous knowledge of what they were. What was it before you knew what it was?
24. Ask yourself “Who am I?” and direct your attention inward. Don’t look for and answer with the mind, just focus your attention at the source of the question. Who is it that asks the question?
25. The story of who you think you are is what prevents you from seeing your true nature as consciousness itself. Awareness is who you are. You have never not been aware.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Martin Luther King Day
I would like to wish you all a happy and joyous Martin Luther King day. WNCW played his "I have a dream" speech on the radio earlier, and I was moved to tears. The presence and passion that this man exuded shaped this country in ways one could only imagine. His fearless fight for unity and justice through peaceful means served as an example of what life is truly about: Love.
Our nation has come so far in the last 40 years, due in great part to Dr. King and his connection with God. Now, his dream for this nation is taking a giant leap that could not have been imagined possible just a few decades earlier. Tomorrow, for the first time in history, a black man will be appointed President of the United States of America. These are truly historic times.
This, too, is why we are all here. We are that change. We are that unity. We are that love. We are that fearlessness. We are that God. We are here to awaken to the truth of who we are, and bring about the same unimaginable change that will save the world, even if we have to die to do it.
In the meantime, feel that gratitude that has allowed us to be alive at this moment, to be present as witnesses to what love can do to change the world.
In peace,
Trey
Our nation has come so far in the last 40 years, due in great part to Dr. King and his connection with God. Now, his dream for this nation is taking a giant leap that could not have been imagined possible just a few decades earlier. Tomorrow, for the first time in history, a black man will be appointed President of the United States of America. These are truly historic times.
This, too, is why we are all here. We are that change. We are that unity. We are that love. We are that fearlessness. We are that God. We are here to awaken to the truth of who we are, and bring about the same unimaginable change that will save the world, even if we have to die to do it.
In the meantime, feel that gratitude that has allowed us to be alive at this moment, to be present as witnesses to what love can do to change the world.
In peace,
Trey
Sunday, January 04, 2009
Let it Be
Hello all,
I hope your new year is off to a great start and feel certain that this will be your year to shine. I wanted to pass this note on to those of you you might find it helpful in some way. Be well.
This could be considered a follow up to my previous post (And the Story Goes On), but I am beginning to fully realize, on an experiential level, the profound simplicity of the words, “Let everything be as it is.” This is something repeated by Eckhart Tolle and is also referred to as “accepting what is,” or accepting the “isness” of the present moment. I knew what it meant intellectually, and have been heeding this advice for a while now, but just recently experienced the meaning of the words more deeply. Despite the seeming redundant nature of this realization (based on previous experiences), I am slowly internalizing these pointers for what they are, due in part to continuous and repeated exposure.
In this particular case I was peeing in the toilet and as I looked down I dropped the story of what a toilet was and looked at it from the present moment perspective, as if I had no past reference to tell me what a toilet was. I just let it be as it was. As I did so the pure simplicity of its isness shined through. It had no name, no story, it just was present. I became simultaneously aware of the one looking at the toilet and thoughts subsided. The toilet was still a toilet, but I just let it be completely as it was, in its natural state of nothingness, as in no name or description. It was simply a never seen before object. It was just a presence, or something here, now. (BTW - I was still able to close the lid, flush, wash my hands, etc., but those actions took place without my needing to do anything, and I was able to just enjoy witnessing each step happen.)
It seems so simple to just let something be as it is, dropping the story and just accepting what is present as an indescribably mystery, as nothingness. That is, in essence, what it is. The word essence is one of those terms I had a mental image of, which meant I was missing the literal meaning of it. Essence for me conjured up the idea of some luminous core. But in simple terms, essence is just the simple or basic substance of something (you might want to look it up in a dictionary).
A toilet is, in essence, a molded ceramic object. But it becomes even more simple than that when viewed from a present moment perspective. It is, in essence, just some nameless thing with a certain shape and texture. But at the deepest level, when you are so present you have no past reference at all, it just is.
This slight shift in perspective is what it all seems to be about. Take any object and look at it. Remove the idea you have in your head about what it is. Look at it as if you have never seen it before. What is it? If it has no name, no known purpose, no labels, what is it you are looking at? What is it, in essence (or on the most basic level), that you have in front of you? Let it be there, just as it is, nothing more, without trying to figure it out or describe it.
For me, what “it” is becomes much more clear. It takes on a richer texture, a new vividness, and an aliveness all its own. Then, it can’t even be said to be an object, because what is an object? It just is. It is just as it is. Nothing more, nothing less. The innate beauty is available for viewing and experiencing when thoughts are removed from the equation. Thoughts about “it” cloud the simple isness of what it is. Its presence (or here-ness) is all there really is to it, but it is a wonderful thing to see.
Taking all of these terms and pointers in a more literal sense cleared things up for me. However, I have to say that becoming fully present is still not easy for me to do very often (sometimes it’s easier than others). It takes a willingness, or one could say a determination, to see what is for what it is. The mind likes to step in and describe or instruct, but thoughts too can be viewed in this same simple way. They are present and can be viewed as what is in this moment, especially when you view them from the perspective of not being “your” thoughts, or not taking them personally. This creates some space between You (the witness of the thoughts) and your thoughts, which makes them less likely to suck you in.
In short, you can change your perspective and change the world.
In peace,
Trey
I hope your new year is off to a great start and feel certain that this will be your year to shine. I wanted to pass this note on to those of you you might find it helpful in some way. Be well.
This could be considered a follow up to my previous post (And the Story Goes On), but I am beginning to fully realize, on an experiential level, the profound simplicity of the words, “Let everything be as it is.” This is something repeated by Eckhart Tolle and is also referred to as “accepting what is,” or accepting the “isness” of the present moment. I knew what it meant intellectually, and have been heeding this advice for a while now, but just recently experienced the meaning of the words more deeply. Despite the seeming redundant nature of this realization (based on previous experiences), I am slowly internalizing these pointers for what they are, due in part to continuous and repeated exposure.
In this particular case I was peeing in the toilet and as I looked down I dropped the story of what a toilet was and looked at it from the present moment perspective, as if I had no past reference to tell me what a toilet was. I just let it be as it was. As I did so the pure simplicity of its isness shined through. It had no name, no story, it just was present. I became simultaneously aware of the one looking at the toilet and thoughts subsided. The toilet was still a toilet, but I just let it be completely as it was, in its natural state of nothingness, as in no name or description. It was simply a never seen before object. It was just a presence, or something here, now. (BTW - I was still able to close the lid, flush, wash my hands, etc., but those actions took place without my needing to do anything, and I was able to just enjoy witnessing each step happen.)
It seems so simple to just let something be as it is, dropping the story and just accepting what is present as an indescribably mystery, as nothingness. That is, in essence, what it is. The word essence is one of those terms I had a mental image of, which meant I was missing the literal meaning of it. Essence for me conjured up the idea of some luminous core. But in simple terms, essence is just the simple or basic substance of something (you might want to look it up in a dictionary).
A toilet is, in essence, a molded ceramic object. But it becomes even more simple than that when viewed from a present moment perspective. It is, in essence, just some nameless thing with a certain shape and texture. But at the deepest level, when you are so present you have no past reference at all, it just is.
This slight shift in perspective is what it all seems to be about. Take any object and look at it. Remove the idea you have in your head about what it is. Look at it as if you have never seen it before. What is it? If it has no name, no known purpose, no labels, what is it you are looking at? What is it, in essence (or on the most basic level), that you have in front of you? Let it be there, just as it is, nothing more, without trying to figure it out or describe it.
For me, what “it” is becomes much more clear. It takes on a richer texture, a new vividness, and an aliveness all its own. Then, it can’t even be said to be an object, because what is an object? It just is. It is just as it is. Nothing more, nothing less. The innate beauty is available for viewing and experiencing when thoughts are removed from the equation. Thoughts about “it” cloud the simple isness of what it is. Its presence (or here-ness) is all there really is to it, but it is a wonderful thing to see.
Taking all of these terms and pointers in a more literal sense cleared things up for me. However, I have to say that becoming fully present is still not easy for me to do very often (sometimes it’s easier than others). It takes a willingness, or one could say a determination, to see what is for what it is. The mind likes to step in and describe or instruct, but thoughts too can be viewed in this same simple way. They are present and can be viewed as what is in this moment, especially when you view them from the perspective of not being “your” thoughts, or not taking them personally. This creates some space between You (the witness of the thoughts) and your thoughts, which makes them less likely to suck you in.
In short, you can change your perspective and change the world.
In peace,
Trey
Monday, November 24, 2008
And the Story Goes On
Hey guys,
I hope you are enjoying the cooler weather and the sky that gets larger as the leaves on trees disappear. I wanted to pass this along as an invitation to take some time for personal investigation. I almost called this one “That’s My Story and I’m Sticking to It” but opted for something a bit simpler.
Byron Katie likes to ask, “Who would you be without your story?” In fact, that’s the name of her newest book. Eckhart Tolle tells us that “You are not your story.” I recommend spending some time looking at what who you are without your story. Seeing yourself without your story involves dropping your past. If you set aside all of the ideas of who you are, who are you? Where are you? What are you doing here? What is all this?
It’s a return to innocence we are talking about here. If you have kids, or watched children, then you have vicariously witnessed what the world looks like to someone who has no preconceived notion of what it is they are looking at. The fascination with the world around them is present without the mental constructs and labels grown ups have. It’s joyful to watch an infant looking out at the world with a sense of awe. That’s our true nature, but we lose site of it along the way as we carve out identities for ourselves and for others.
You are not your name. When that idea first came to me it was a bit shocking. It was as if the question, “Who would you be without your story?” had taken on a new depth to it. Before, I was Trey looking at who Trey would be without his story. Then, all of the sudden, I had to take Trey out of it. If I’m not my name, who am I? We’re so attached to our names, because we have been called by them all our lives, that we don’t even realize that who we are is far more than just a name.
What was it before you knew what it was? Look at anything around you and ask yourself, “What was that before I knew what it was?” There was a time when you didn’t know what it was. What was it then? It must have been a complete mystery. Just as the infant looks on the world with the same curiosity and wonder, you can look at that with the same nameless sense of wonder that permeates everything we have come to know.
Throughout each day, we are adding to and narrating our story. Our minds are like story tellers weaving a tale about everything that pops up in our life. I’m constantly telling stories in my head. In fact, for each one of the blogs I actually write up and send out, I mentally write half a dozen. My mind is busy writing instead of Being a great deal of the time. Or it’s caught in a vicious, repetitive, ego dominated conversation with someone who’s not there. When I realize it’s happening I have a choice to either stop the story, or just notice that it’s going on. But I still get sucked into my story over an over again.
Recently I started compiling my past blog posts into one big journal. I’ve been writing these for the past few years and decided I would put them all together into a book. It was beneficial for me to go back and read what I had once written, but in the process of compiling them I realized that I was contributing to the story of the guy who shares these ideas, insights and teachings with others, still seeing myself as my own mind made identity (or the “little me” as some have called it).
Why not just stop telling my story? In my case I think it’s my mind’s self-defense mechanism. When I am setting aside my story, dropping my thoughts, becoming present, connecting with the witnessing presence underneath, becoming still, allowing everything to be as it is (however you want to state it), the mind tends to come in with an attempt to describe it, or grasp it, thereby ensuring its survival. It is attached to the story and doesn’t want to let go. Who would I be without everything I hold as true? It’s a bit scary so the mind starts seeking and the story is then reborn. In fact, the story of the little me who can not see my true nature due to my attachment to my story, is yet just another layer to the story. Raman Maharshi said, “The only blockage to self realization is the idea that there is a blockage. You already are what you are seeking.”
I believe this is a quote by Papaji but I did not cite it when I wrote it down. “So put your story away. It is not who you are. People usually live carrying a burden of past and future, a burden of their personal history, which they hope will fulfill itself in the future. It won’t, so roll up that old scroll. Be done with it.” Gangaji invites us not to deny the story, but not to indulge the story either, and take an opportunity to see what is untouched by the story.
Byron Katie tells us, “We do only three things in life: We sit, we stand, and we lie horizontal. That’s about it. Everything else is a story.” The story is sticky because we’ve been telling it for so long, but what we truly are is far more substantial than just a name or a history or a set of beliefs. But don’t take my word for it. See for yourself who you would be without a story. See what the things around you would be without a story.
In peace,
The story formerly known as Trey ;)
I hope you are enjoying the cooler weather and the sky that gets larger as the leaves on trees disappear. I wanted to pass this along as an invitation to take some time for personal investigation. I almost called this one “That’s My Story and I’m Sticking to It” but opted for something a bit simpler.
Byron Katie likes to ask, “Who would you be without your story?” In fact, that’s the name of her newest book. Eckhart Tolle tells us that “You are not your story.” I recommend spending some time looking at what who you are without your story. Seeing yourself without your story involves dropping your past. If you set aside all of the ideas of who you are, who are you? Where are you? What are you doing here? What is all this?
It’s a return to innocence we are talking about here. If you have kids, or watched children, then you have vicariously witnessed what the world looks like to someone who has no preconceived notion of what it is they are looking at. The fascination with the world around them is present without the mental constructs and labels grown ups have. It’s joyful to watch an infant looking out at the world with a sense of awe. That’s our true nature, but we lose site of it along the way as we carve out identities for ourselves and for others.
You are not your name. When that idea first came to me it was a bit shocking. It was as if the question, “Who would you be without your story?” had taken on a new depth to it. Before, I was Trey looking at who Trey would be without his story. Then, all of the sudden, I had to take Trey out of it. If I’m not my name, who am I? We’re so attached to our names, because we have been called by them all our lives, that we don’t even realize that who we are is far more than just a name.
What was it before you knew what it was? Look at anything around you and ask yourself, “What was that before I knew what it was?” There was a time when you didn’t know what it was. What was it then? It must have been a complete mystery. Just as the infant looks on the world with the same curiosity and wonder, you can look at that with the same nameless sense of wonder that permeates everything we have come to know.
Throughout each day, we are adding to and narrating our story. Our minds are like story tellers weaving a tale about everything that pops up in our life. I’m constantly telling stories in my head. In fact, for each one of the blogs I actually write up and send out, I mentally write half a dozen. My mind is busy writing instead of Being a great deal of the time. Or it’s caught in a vicious, repetitive, ego dominated conversation with someone who’s not there. When I realize it’s happening I have a choice to either stop the story, or just notice that it’s going on. But I still get sucked into my story over an over again.
Recently I started compiling my past blog posts into one big journal. I’ve been writing these for the past few years and decided I would put them all together into a book. It was beneficial for me to go back and read what I had once written, but in the process of compiling them I realized that I was contributing to the story of the guy who shares these ideas, insights and teachings with others, still seeing myself as my own mind made identity (or the “little me” as some have called it).
Why not just stop telling my story? In my case I think it’s my mind’s self-defense mechanism. When I am setting aside my story, dropping my thoughts, becoming present, connecting with the witnessing presence underneath, becoming still, allowing everything to be as it is (however you want to state it), the mind tends to come in with an attempt to describe it, or grasp it, thereby ensuring its survival. It is attached to the story and doesn’t want to let go. Who would I be without everything I hold as true? It’s a bit scary so the mind starts seeking and the story is then reborn. In fact, the story of the little me who can not see my true nature due to my attachment to my story, is yet just another layer to the story. Raman Maharshi said, “The only blockage to self realization is the idea that there is a blockage. You already are what you are seeking.”
I believe this is a quote by Papaji but I did not cite it when I wrote it down. “So put your story away. It is not who you are. People usually live carrying a burden of past and future, a burden of their personal history, which they hope will fulfill itself in the future. It won’t, so roll up that old scroll. Be done with it.” Gangaji invites us not to deny the story, but not to indulge the story either, and take an opportunity to see what is untouched by the story.
Byron Katie tells us, “We do only three things in life: We sit, we stand, and we lie horizontal. That’s about it. Everything else is a story.” The story is sticky because we’ve been telling it for so long, but what we truly are is far more substantial than just a name or a history or a set of beliefs. But don’t take my word for it. See for yourself who you would be without a story. See what the things around you would be without a story.
In peace,
The story formerly known as Trey ;)
Sunday, November 02, 2008
Political Correctness
This post was written prior to the election, As a post election note - I was over joyed to see Obama win the election in a landslide. These are some truly historic times we are all living in. I feel so lucky to be here to witness it.
Dear friends,
I hope you are enjoying this beautiful time of year. The Fall colors are in full force. The air is crisp. The insects that have been providing songs all Summer long are growing quiet. The nights are getting longer. But there is something else in the air. The impending election and financial crisis has a lot of people on edge. Politics seems to be on everyone’s mind and is the subject of many conversations. All while activists on both sides are doing their best to help ensure their candidate wins.
I have tried not to get sucked in by all of the drama, but I’ve watched a debate or two and listened to a few news stories. What I see is different people who have different ideas about what is best for our country. What I also see is negative light being cast on those who have a different idea about what’s best for our country. “I’m right,” “No, I’m right,” seems to be the easiest way to sum it all up.
Regardless of what our political views are, we think they are right, otherwise we would not cling to those views. When these beliefs are held too tightly, it results in negatively judging those who do not agree. Often times people will go to great extremes to prove they are right and the other person is wrong. This is what wars are fought over. In fact, the ego can’t even entertain the possibility that our beliefs might be wrong.
The interesting thing about it is that no one can really be impartial or unbiased if they are clinging to beliefs. Everything they hear is colored by their beliefs. We only hear what we want to hear, which reinforces the belief that we are right. The spin doctor in the head (the ego) is being fed by the spin doctors of the candidates and the media (their egos).
I have not been very politically active since I became diagnosed with epilepsy, and found a new path to follow. If you haven’t heard the story before, I had my first grand mal seizure, which led to my diagnosis, on November 7, 2004 (my anniversary is coming up). I had just learned that John Kerry had conceded the Presidential election before all of the votes in Florida had been counted. I was quite shocked, and as I went into the kitchen to tell my wife, I seized. A while later in the ER, I was told I had had a seizure. Prior to that event, I was an avid Bush hater (though I’m not now), and had been very politically active since the 2000 election. So, this was a bit of a climactic experience that made me realize there is more to life than politics.
Needless to say, I am familiar with all of the frustration people have about politics. But I was lucky enough to have my priorities set straight after the last Presidential election. I now see how harmful this animosity for opposing views can be to everyone involved. I may have my own ideas about who might be best suited to run the country for the next four years, but I see both candidates as people who want to win for what they perceive to be the greater good. I no longer have any animosity for anyone, and know that it’s arrogant of me to think that I know what’s best.
I thought I would leave you with some lyrics from a Michael Franti (of Spearhead) song entitled “Is Love Enough” that seems well suited for this occasion. May we all remain open to the possibility that our ideas about what’s best may not be what is best after all.
In peace,
Trey
We want freedom of speech
but we all talkin' at the same time
We say we want peace
but nobody wants to change their own mind
And So it goes on and on and on and on and on
for a thousand years
A thousand years I say
And it goes on and on and on and on and on
What language are your tears
are your Tears
Everybody wants to live the life of kings and queens
but nobody wants to stay and plow the fields
Everybody wants to tell their neighbors how to live
but nobody wants to listen to how they feel
And So it goes on and on and on and on and on
for a thousand years
A thousand years I say
And it goes on and on and on and on and on
What language are your tears
are your Tears
What I got to say right now
is love enough, yeah
love enough, yeah
love enough
or can you love some more...
Dear friends,
I hope you are enjoying this beautiful time of year. The Fall colors are in full force. The air is crisp. The insects that have been providing songs all Summer long are growing quiet. The nights are getting longer. But there is something else in the air. The impending election and financial crisis has a lot of people on edge. Politics seems to be on everyone’s mind and is the subject of many conversations. All while activists on both sides are doing their best to help ensure their candidate wins.
I have tried not to get sucked in by all of the drama, but I’ve watched a debate or two and listened to a few news stories. What I see is different people who have different ideas about what is best for our country. What I also see is negative light being cast on those who have a different idea about what’s best for our country. “I’m right,” “No, I’m right,” seems to be the easiest way to sum it all up.
Regardless of what our political views are, we think they are right, otherwise we would not cling to those views. When these beliefs are held too tightly, it results in negatively judging those who do not agree. Often times people will go to great extremes to prove they are right and the other person is wrong. This is what wars are fought over. In fact, the ego can’t even entertain the possibility that our beliefs might be wrong.
The interesting thing about it is that no one can really be impartial or unbiased if they are clinging to beliefs. Everything they hear is colored by their beliefs. We only hear what we want to hear, which reinforces the belief that we are right. The spin doctor in the head (the ego) is being fed by the spin doctors of the candidates and the media (their egos).
I have not been very politically active since I became diagnosed with epilepsy, and found a new path to follow. If you haven’t heard the story before, I had my first grand mal seizure, which led to my diagnosis, on November 7, 2004 (my anniversary is coming up). I had just learned that John Kerry had conceded the Presidential election before all of the votes in Florida had been counted. I was quite shocked, and as I went into the kitchen to tell my wife, I seized. A while later in the ER, I was told I had had a seizure. Prior to that event, I was an avid Bush hater (though I’m not now), and had been very politically active since the 2000 election. So, this was a bit of a climactic experience that made me realize there is more to life than politics.
Needless to say, I am familiar with all of the frustration people have about politics. But I was lucky enough to have my priorities set straight after the last Presidential election. I now see how harmful this animosity for opposing views can be to everyone involved. I may have my own ideas about who might be best suited to run the country for the next four years, but I see both candidates as people who want to win for what they perceive to be the greater good. I no longer have any animosity for anyone, and know that it’s arrogant of me to think that I know what’s best.
I thought I would leave you with some lyrics from a Michael Franti (of Spearhead) song entitled “Is Love Enough” that seems well suited for this occasion. May we all remain open to the possibility that our ideas about what’s best may not be what is best after all.
In peace,
Trey
We want freedom of speech
but we all talkin' at the same time
We say we want peace
but nobody wants to change their own mind
And So it goes on and on and on and on and on
for a thousand years
A thousand years I say
And it goes on and on and on and on and on
What language are your tears
are your Tears
Everybody wants to live the life of kings and queens
but nobody wants to stay and plow the fields
Everybody wants to tell their neighbors how to live
but nobody wants to listen to how they feel
And So it goes on and on and on and on and on
for a thousand years
A thousand years I say
And it goes on and on and on and on and on
What language are your tears
are your Tears
What I got to say right now
is love enough, yeah
love enough, yeah
love enough
or can you love some more...
Friday, September 19, 2008
We Only Hurt the Ones We Love
About a month or so ago, I was at the DMV getting my driver’s license renewed. As is common there was a fairly long wait. I was sitting there, observing my surroundings and meditating a bit. A man and woman came in and sat down across from me with their son (maybe 4 or 5 years old). The boy was interested in exploring a bit, but not straying far from his parents. The father decided the boy should be sitting in a chair next to him rather than wandering about. After the boy was placed in his chair, he got bored and got up to stand in front of his chair. The father gently popped his behind and told him to sit down. The boy really didn’t want to so the father decided it was time for some disciplinary action because the boy was not obeying. So, the man took the boy by the arm and walked him down a hallway to spank him. The boy knew what was coming and started to cry, causing much more disturbance than the boy was causing before.
When they came back the boy was sniffling a bit and the father placed him in the chair next to him. The boy got up and wanted to go sit on the other side next to his mother. The father was insistent that the boy sit next to him (the mother was reading something and not getting involved). When the boy went to sit next to his mother, against his father’s wishes, the man took the boy again by the arm down the hall. This time the boy was crying much louder than before and trying to pull away. He said through his tears, “I just want to be good.” Despite the boy’s plea, the father proceeded to take him down the hall and discipline him. It was very heart breaking and frustrating to watch.
When they came back the boy went over and sat by his mother, which was allowed this time. Meanwhile, I was grappling with my own emotions over what I had witnessed. I felt extreme compassion for the little boy who was just trying to be good. But I was having problems having compassion for the father. I thought about how this man was probably raised the same way and was under the impression this was the best way to raise a child. I thought about how this child’s karmic disposition placed him in this situation to somehow shape his life in unimaginably positive ways. I thought about the mother who stayed out of it the whole time, wondering if she had been taught by her husband not to get involved.
Despite all of this, I was still feeling anger toward the man. I tried doing The Work in my mind which lead me to remember something Byron Katie said in one of her books. She was asked how she would react if she saw a mother in a store abusing her children in some way. Katie said that she would see that and remember a time when she too felt that way, angry and confused at her children, lashing out at them. She said she might approach the woman with a deep compassion and ask if she could help, or even tell the woman that she too had been in her situation.
Since I have never been a parent I couldn’t quite identify from that perspective. But then it hit me. A few days earlier, my wife Shelby, and I were out running some errands. We had stopped at a store and I was going to run in for something. Shelby asked me something about getting a bite to eat while we were out, and I said something out of frustration, dismissing the idea as I got out of the car. As I got into the store I was struck by what had just happened. I saw Shelby’s face and mood go from upbeat to defeated. I saw the smile disappear from her face. I almost started to cry when I replayed the scene in my head.
I thought to myself, “What have I done?” “How could I be so unfeeling?” “How many times have I done that and not realized it?” She was trying to be nice and I had just acted pissy. I basically reacted out of unconscious habit, which I’ve been doing most of my life, causing unnecessary suffering each time. This time I caught it and I felt the pain it caused. I got a glimpse of true compassion. When I got back to the car I apologized for my behavior and resumed the conversation I had so rudely cut off.
Once the memory of this came back to me at the DMV, I was able to look at the man and see myself in him. I have been just as abusive to my loved ones without knowing it. How could I condemn someone else for doing something I myself have done in one form or another? I then felt compassion for this man (who is me) hurting the one he loves most out of total unconsciousness. It makes me want to cry thinking back on it all.
In hindsight I can see clearly that we are all just trying to be good. But when we are punished for it we shut down. It’s a self defense mechanism to protect us from getting hurt again. We begin to put up barriers to prevent future pain, barriers which also cut us off from love.
I can look back and find countless ways in which I have hurt my loved ones, which can lead to deep feelings of guilt and shame. But guilt can be a teacher showing us that there is a better way. The better way is to become fully conscious of our habitual thoughts and transcend them. Be willing to drop the barriers we have put up. Find compassion for all of our fellow human beings.
Now, when I find myself judging someone else, I just take a quick look and see that I too have been just like that, felt just like that, acted just like that. I am no different from anyone else on this planet. I have no one left to judge but myself.
Lots of Love,
Trey
When they came back the boy was sniffling a bit and the father placed him in the chair next to him. The boy got up and wanted to go sit on the other side next to his mother. The father was insistent that the boy sit next to him (the mother was reading something and not getting involved). When the boy went to sit next to his mother, against his father’s wishes, the man took the boy again by the arm down the hall. This time the boy was crying much louder than before and trying to pull away. He said through his tears, “I just want to be good.” Despite the boy’s plea, the father proceeded to take him down the hall and discipline him. It was very heart breaking and frustrating to watch.
When they came back the boy went over and sat by his mother, which was allowed this time. Meanwhile, I was grappling with my own emotions over what I had witnessed. I felt extreme compassion for the little boy who was just trying to be good. But I was having problems having compassion for the father. I thought about how this man was probably raised the same way and was under the impression this was the best way to raise a child. I thought about how this child’s karmic disposition placed him in this situation to somehow shape his life in unimaginably positive ways. I thought about the mother who stayed out of it the whole time, wondering if she had been taught by her husband not to get involved.
Despite all of this, I was still feeling anger toward the man. I tried doing The Work in my mind which lead me to remember something Byron Katie said in one of her books. She was asked how she would react if she saw a mother in a store abusing her children in some way. Katie said that she would see that and remember a time when she too felt that way, angry and confused at her children, lashing out at them. She said she might approach the woman with a deep compassion and ask if she could help, or even tell the woman that she too had been in her situation.
Since I have never been a parent I couldn’t quite identify from that perspective. But then it hit me. A few days earlier, my wife Shelby, and I were out running some errands. We had stopped at a store and I was going to run in for something. Shelby asked me something about getting a bite to eat while we were out, and I said something out of frustration, dismissing the idea as I got out of the car. As I got into the store I was struck by what had just happened. I saw Shelby’s face and mood go from upbeat to defeated. I saw the smile disappear from her face. I almost started to cry when I replayed the scene in my head.
I thought to myself, “What have I done?” “How could I be so unfeeling?” “How many times have I done that and not realized it?” She was trying to be nice and I had just acted pissy. I basically reacted out of unconscious habit, which I’ve been doing most of my life, causing unnecessary suffering each time. This time I caught it and I felt the pain it caused. I got a glimpse of true compassion. When I got back to the car I apologized for my behavior and resumed the conversation I had so rudely cut off.
Once the memory of this came back to me at the DMV, I was able to look at the man and see myself in him. I have been just as abusive to my loved ones without knowing it. How could I condemn someone else for doing something I myself have done in one form or another? I then felt compassion for this man (who is me) hurting the one he loves most out of total unconsciousness. It makes me want to cry thinking back on it all.
In hindsight I can see clearly that we are all just trying to be good. But when we are punished for it we shut down. It’s a self defense mechanism to protect us from getting hurt again. We begin to put up barriers to prevent future pain, barriers which also cut us off from love.
I can look back and find countless ways in which I have hurt my loved ones, which can lead to deep feelings of guilt and shame. But guilt can be a teacher showing us that there is a better way. The better way is to become fully conscious of our habitual thoughts and transcend them. Be willing to drop the barriers we have put up. Find compassion for all of our fellow human beings.
Now, when I find myself judging someone else, I just take a quick look and see that I too have been just like that, felt just like that, acted just like that. I am no different from anyone else on this planet. I have no one left to judge but myself.
Lots of Love,
Trey
Friday, August 01, 2008
Out of Control
I hope you all are well. I'm sending this on the heels of the passing of my wife's uncle, who recently lost his battle with cancer. Since we have no control over when we die, what we do while we are here is always of the utmost importance. I hope the following will, in some way, help you enjoy your life to the fullest. After all, that's why I continue to share what I share.
One of the recurring themes in my readings and self inquiry lately has pointed me toward the idea that we are immersed in a continuous unfolding of events over which we have no control. What has been revealed to me more and more these days is that as things happen in our lives we impose thoughts on these happenings that make us think that we are somehow responsible for their occurrence. When in reality we can not know for sure, that we are actually responsible. It has been said many times by many different people that we are not the doer, nor are we the thinker. Our mind tells us that we are doing these things and can readily show us evidence of how true that is. But if you allow yourself to look deep enough to see the fallacy in that belief, you may get a glimpse of the freedom that can be experienced without that belief.
Byron Katie has this to say: “I invite everyone to notice where their hands are right now. Where their feet are right now and did you put them there? Did you plan it or was it a happening? You know, it could be that we are being done and everything else is just a story we’re believing and who would you be without your story? Not forever, but just right here, right now, in this moment, who would you be without your story?”
Our mind takes credit for what we do and may be uncomfortable with the idea that we are not the doer. It may think that it has to be a doer in order to get things done. The mind creates stories about what “it” does that just reinforce the illusion that the “it” doing things is the “me” I see myself as.
Jeannie Zandi poses these questions: “What if everything is always happening through you; not yours, not something you created? But is being created through you? What if it’s not up to you? What if it’s not even a little up to you?”
Eckhart Tolle points out that we are not the thinker. Instead we are being thought. In fact, our thoughts are not personal and have nothing to do with who we really are. They just arise and then disappear. When we believe them, we see ourselves as separate entities rather than the animating force behind our thoughts. His suggestion is to not take our thoughts all that seriously. Tolle also suggests that you can “choose” to step out of identification with the mind and into presence. But what is really happening when you choose to be present, is that presence is choosing to emerge. It appears that the little “me” is choosing it, but it is happening by itself. He points out that it is helpful to think that you are making it happen even though it is happening by itself through you.
Katie also has this to say, “Being present means living without control and always having your needs met. For people who are tired of the pain, nothing could be worse than trying to control what can’t be controlled. If you want real control, drop the illusion of control. Let life live you. It does anyway.”
I invite you to visualize what it would be like if you had no control over your life and where it takes you. Visualize what it would be like to know that everything that needed to be done would be done, right on time. What would it be like if every decision that needed to be made would be made through you and would be made in your best interest? I invite you to go deeply into what life would be like with the confidence that you are a puppet being guided through life by a force that knows what is in your best interest, where making mistakes are impossible. Observe that force in action as it breaths you, feeds you, walks you down the sidewalk, or drives you down the road. What does that experience look like for you?
For me it looks like total freedom. Total inner peace and acceptance of what is become the norm. From that place I could go about life following it wherever it decided to take me, without worry or stress or conflict, with a deep knowing that whatever happened was exactly what I needed. I wouldn’t become complacent, or worry about complacency, because something wants to experience this life to its fullest through me.
Michael Gazzaniga, a prominent neuroscientist, has this to say, “The left brain weaves its story in order to convince itself and you that it is in full control... What is so adaptive about having what amounts to a spin doctor in the left brain? The interpreter is really trying to keep our personal story together. To do that, we have to learn to lie to ourselves.”
Here is another quote from an interview with Byron Katie: “You know what I love about this world? No control. No control. Oh my goodness! What could be better than that? We are not the doer. We can just watch.” But when we believe the thoughts that say we are in control, and things don’t go our way, we become frustrated. When thought arises, and we see that thought as just another happening, we don’t use them to delude ourselves into thinking we are the doer.
John Sherman has this to say: “The idea that you are in charge of how this form [our body] meets the needs of others is arrogance. The idea that you are the one who is responsible for determining that just the right thing is said, or just the right thing is given, is arrogance... It is not your job to decide how you should be used. Really. You have no idea. Well, maybe you do have an idea, but ideas are useless!”
There is quote after quote I could share with you from various sources. Instead I just invite you to entertain the possibility that we are "being done" rather than "doing the doing". To do so makes surrender so much easier, and surrendering to what is is the ultimate key to peace.
When I asked Jeannie Zandi about how free will fit into the grand scheme of things, she said, “We must function with a full intentioned heart and at the same time with a sense of the futility of changing anything without the will of God. Basically that's what we surrender to - the Holy Will - and what we surrender is our own will.”
Katie puts it like this, “When you no longer have a will of your own, there is no time and space. It all becomes a flow. You don’t decide, you flow from one happening to the next, and everything is decided for you.”
Enjoy the ride. You can’t do it wrong :)
Peace,
Trey
One of the recurring themes in my readings and self inquiry lately has pointed me toward the idea that we are immersed in a continuous unfolding of events over which we have no control. What has been revealed to me more and more these days is that as things happen in our lives we impose thoughts on these happenings that make us think that we are somehow responsible for their occurrence. When in reality we can not know for sure, that we are actually responsible. It has been said many times by many different people that we are not the doer, nor are we the thinker. Our mind tells us that we are doing these things and can readily show us evidence of how true that is. But if you allow yourself to look deep enough to see the fallacy in that belief, you may get a glimpse of the freedom that can be experienced without that belief.
Byron Katie has this to say: “I invite everyone to notice where their hands are right now. Where their feet are right now and did you put them there? Did you plan it or was it a happening? You know, it could be that we are being done and everything else is just a story we’re believing and who would you be without your story? Not forever, but just right here, right now, in this moment, who would you be without your story?”
Our mind takes credit for what we do and may be uncomfortable with the idea that we are not the doer. It may think that it has to be a doer in order to get things done. The mind creates stories about what “it” does that just reinforce the illusion that the “it” doing things is the “me” I see myself as.
Jeannie Zandi poses these questions: “What if everything is always happening through you; not yours, not something you created? But is being created through you? What if it’s not up to you? What if it’s not even a little up to you?”
Eckhart Tolle points out that we are not the thinker. Instead we are being thought. In fact, our thoughts are not personal and have nothing to do with who we really are. They just arise and then disappear. When we believe them, we see ourselves as separate entities rather than the animating force behind our thoughts. His suggestion is to not take our thoughts all that seriously. Tolle also suggests that you can “choose” to step out of identification with the mind and into presence. But what is really happening when you choose to be present, is that presence is choosing to emerge. It appears that the little “me” is choosing it, but it is happening by itself. He points out that it is helpful to think that you are making it happen even though it is happening by itself through you.
Katie also has this to say, “Being present means living without control and always having your needs met. For people who are tired of the pain, nothing could be worse than trying to control what can’t be controlled. If you want real control, drop the illusion of control. Let life live you. It does anyway.”
I invite you to visualize what it would be like if you had no control over your life and where it takes you. Visualize what it would be like to know that everything that needed to be done would be done, right on time. What would it be like if every decision that needed to be made would be made through you and would be made in your best interest? I invite you to go deeply into what life would be like with the confidence that you are a puppet being guided through life by a force that knows what is in your best interest, where making mistakes are impossible. Observe that force in action as it breaths you, feeds you, walks you down the sidewalk, or drives you down the road. What does that experience look like for you?
For me it looks like total freedom. Total inner peace and acceptance of what is become the norm. From that place I could go about life following it wherever it decided to take me, without worry or stress or conflict, with a deep knowing that whatever happened was exactly what I needed. I wouldn’t become complacent, or worry about complacency, because something wants to experience this life to its fullest through me.
Michael Gazzaniga, a prominent neuroscientist, has this to say, “The left brain weaves its story in order to convince itself and you that it is in full control... What is so adaptive about having what amounts to a spin doctor in the left brain? The interpreter is really trying to keep our personal story together. To do that, we have to learn to lie to ourselves.”
Here is another quote from an interview with Byron Katie: “You know what I love about this world? No control. No control. Oh my goodness! What could be better than that? We are not the doer. We can just watch.” But when we believe the thoughts that say we are in control, and things don’t go our way, we become frustrated. When thought arises, and we see that thought as just another happening, we don’t use them to delude ourselves into thinking we are the doer.
John Sherman has this to say: “The idea that you are in charge of how this form [our body] meets the needs of others is arrogance. The idea that you are the one who is responsible for determining that just the right thing is said, or just the right thing is given, is arrogance... It is not your job to decide how you should be used. Really. You have no idea. Well, maybe you do have an idea, but ideas are useless!”
There is quote after quote I could share with you from various sources. Instead I just invite you to entertain the possibility that we are "being done" rather than "doing the doing". To do so makes surrender so much easier, and surrendering to what is is the ultimate key to peace.
When I asked Jeannie Zandi about how free will fit into the grand scheme of things, she said, “We must function with a full intentioned heart and at the same time with a sense of the futility of changing anything without the will of God. Basically that's what we surrender to - the Holy Will - and what we surrender is our own will.”
Katie puts it like this, “When you no longer have a will of your own, there is no time and space. It all becomes a flow. You don’t decide, you flow from one happening to the next, and everything is decided for you.”
Enjoy the ride. You can’t do it wrong :)
Peace,
Trey
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Driving Lessons
Three and a half years after being diagnosed with epilepsy and losing my driving privileges, I am now back in the driver’s seat. It was so beneficial for me to be relegated to the passenger seat all of these years, and I am just now realizing the significance of it all. It helped teach me surrender and acceptance of not being in control. I’ve ridden with many different people with different driving styles over the years and have had to put my faith in each one to get me from point A to B.
I wouldn’t say that I made a “good” passenger necessarily. There were countless times, while riding with my wife (who is a very good driver by the way), that I over reacted to situations by grabbing the “oh shit” handle. That tended to stress her out even more and it showed a lack of trust in her abilities. But I occasionally found myself preparing for what I thought would be certain impact. In effect, I was reacting to a future possibility that never happened. I gradually improved in my ability to remain present and allow it all to be.
Now that I am back behind the wheel I’m learning a great deal more about what driving is really about. I have tended to be a bit more inconsistent than I used to be, sometimes going under the speed limit and sometimes over, always knowing that I’m going the right speed. I’m just taking in the scenery from a whole new perspective. My wife, who is now having to adjust to passenger life with someone who doesn’t drive the way she does, sometimes points out that I am driving too slow or too fast. I’ve had a few good laughs over her comparing me to a 90 year old driver.
But one of the things I’ve noticed from this is that if I believe the thought that I am doing it wrong, I create stress for myself. It’s not her comments about my driving, it’s my reaction to them that does that. I love that. I can be a stress free driver if I so choose.
However, there is this whole other side of driving that I am rediscovering. Bad drivers used to be one of my pet peeves when I was behind the wheel. I lost that pet peeve as a passenger because it wasn’t my problem to deal with anymore, which gave me the ability to see the hidden lessons for those who were impacted by poor driving. Now I’m getting to see my old reactive patterns resurface. I see how easy it is for me to project onto other drivers.
For example, if I’m going the speed limit and someone behind me is following closely, I project that they are in a hurry and I am slowing them down. I can’t know that for sure, but when I believe that thought it creates tension in me. I notice a tendency to always be checking in with the surrounding cars and projecting how my driving is impacting their view of me. I notice tension in my right thigh, which has so much “riding” on it. (On a side note, I had a lot of body work done a few months back and discovered a great deal of pent up emotional energy in my right thigh).
Also, when I get in a situation where I cut off someone (it’s happened a time or two), I can create a whole story for the other person on how they might be angered by what I have done. I notice my tendency to justify my actions, possibly even blaming them. I can monitor them in my rearview, looking for evidence to support my belief about how they must be feeling. I see that happen and realize I am, again, the cause of my own stress. I’m seeing how I concoct stories about the drivers around me and how I’m affected by seeing them as stories instead of just other people going from point A to B, going through the same things I’m going through. What a wonderful lesson it has been to see driving without the stories.
Driving can be such a relaxing meditation when I don’t allow myself to believe the stories I create. I can give my full attention to the beautiful scenery, the road ahead, and allow myself to relax, knowing that whatever will be will be, as well as see things that cause tension as opportunities for personal growth. I’m being propelled through space, not knowing what the next moment will bring, without the stress of how I will react to it. Ultimately, even though I’m the one driving, I’m not in control anyway. But that’s another observation in and of itself. May you drive safely and without stories :)
In peace,
Trey
I wouldn’t say that I made a “good” passenger necessarily. There were countless times, while riding with my wife (who is a very good driver by the way), that I over reacted to situations by grabbing the “oh shit” handle. That tended to stress her out even more and it showed a lack of trust in her abilities. But I occasionally found myself preparing for what I thought would be certain impact. In effect, I was reacting to a future possibility that never happened. I gradually improved in my ability to remain present and allow it all to be.
Now that I am back behind the wheel I’m learning a great deal more about what driving is really about. I have tended to be a bit more inconsistent than I used to be, sometimes going under the speed limit and sometimes over, always knowing that I’m going the right speed. I’m just taking in the scenery from a whole new perspective. My wife, who is now having to adjust to passenger life with someone who doesn’t drive the way she does, sometimes points out that I am driving too slow or too fast. I’ve had a few good laughs over her comparing me to a 90 year old driver.
But one of the things I’ve noticed from this is that if I believe the thought that I am doing it wrong, I create stress for myself. It’s not her comments about my driving, it’s my reaction to them that does that. I love that. I can be a stress free driver if I so choose.
However, there is this whole other side of driving that I am rediscovering. Bad drivers used to be one of my pet peeves when I was behind the wheel. I lost that pet peeve as a passenger because it wasn’t my problem to deal with anymore, which gave me the ability to see the hidden lessons for those who were impacted by poor driving. Now I’m getting to see my old reactive patterns resurface. I see how easy it is for me to project onto other drivers.
For example, if I’m going the speed limit and someone behind me is following closely, I project that they are in a hurry and I am slowing them down. I can’t know that for sure, but when I believe that thought it creates tension in me. I notice a tendency to always be checking in with the surrounding cars and projecting how my driving is impacting their view of me. I notice tension in my right thigh, which has so much “riding” on it. (On a side note, I had a lot of body work done a few months back and discovered a great deal of pent up emotional energy in my right thigh).
Also, when I get in a situation where I cut off someone (it’s happened a time or two), I can create a whole story for the other person on how they might be angered by what I have done. I notice my tendency to justify my actions, possibly even blaming them. I can monitor them in my rearview, looking for evidence to support my belief about how they must be feeling. I see that happen and realize I am, again, the cause of my own stress. I’m seeing how I concoct stories about the drivers around me and how I’m affected by seeing them as stories instead of just other people going from point A to B, going through the same things I’m going through. What a wonderful lesson it has been to see driving without the stories.
Driving can be such a relaxing meditation when I don’t allow myself to believe the stories I create. I can give my full attention to the beautiful scenery, the road ahead, and allow myself to relax, knowing that whatever will be will be, as well as see things that cause tension as opportunities for personal growth. I’m being propelled through space, not knowing what the next moment will bring, without the stress of how I will react to it. Ultimately, even though I’m the one driving, I’m not in control anyway. But that’s another observation in and of itself. May you drive safely and without stories :)
In peace,
Trey
Sunday, June 29, 2008
When to Act vs When to Accept
One of the gray areas for me on my journey has been acting on vs. accepting what is. I would like to share with you my own experiences with this in terms of interpersonal relationships, as well as what I have read.
As an example, when I am engaged in a conversation with someone and they say something that I feel is untrue about myself, I accept that rather than react to it (unless I slip up). In fact, I go a step further to look for the truth in what is being said to me. Other people tend to point out the things in us that we don’t want to deal with or haven’t dealt with yet, especially if what they are saying causes an emotional reaction in us.
Aside from that, what they are saying is true for them even if I see it as being false. Sometimes I see how another person is actually projecting their own issues onto me, but I don’t point that out to them as that is their business. Plus, I may be tempted to use that observation as an escape route from my own culpability. The main thing I do is notice how I feel when that happens and respect the other person where they are on their journey. I don’t try to convince them they are wrong.
The reality of this moment is what is being presented to us, regardless of what form that takes. As Byron Katie points out, “When I argue with reality, I lose – but only 100% of the time.” So rather than argue with reality because I don’t like what it has presented, I try to make peace with it and take action from that space. I remember that we are always being presented with exactly what we need at this moment, otherwise it would not be happening. I try to look at my life situation as if it is calling me to awaken. Life serves as my mirror. My ideas about myself are projected out onto others and I can learn from that if I am open and not in a state of resistence.
It’s also been illustrated to me that someone else's pain that they take out on you, in the form of anger or hostility, ultimately may have nothing to do with you. It has to do with their own past pain. This makes it much easier for me not to take things personally, or at least notice when I do. If someone seems angry at me, I know deep down that I am playing an important role in bringing something to that person's attention that they have not dealt with yet, just as they are doing for me. I am just a mirror of them and vise versa, so I try to look at it from that perspective. Regardless of whether we are acting consciously or unconsciously, we are all part of a universal process designed to bring about freedom in one another, whether we like it or not, accept it or resist it.
When someone close to me is suffering and I want to help but don’t know what to do, I can accept "not knowing" as it is. In so doing, I have had ideas come to me out of that state of accepting my own confusion. In effect, clarity can come from a state of confusion when we surrender to the fact that we don’t have a clue what to do. Meditation can also aid in finding the "right" action by becoming fully present and putting out an intention or question. It's said that we can not ask a question we don't already know the answer to, which I have found to be true. That means we just need to clear our minds so that answer can come to us.
At this stage I am constantly seeing how identification with the past creates hostility and suffering in myself and other people. When I see two people arguing or saying things designed to hurt, or complaining about something someone said to them, I see how simple it would be for them to release that feeling, simply by doing The Work (as Byron Katie refers to it) on the issues at hand, or by becoming fully present with no concept of an imagined past. It is not the other person causing the suffering we experience, it’s our own thoughts about the situation or person. I typically don’t offer this up to people because they may not want to rid themselves of those feelings for fear of losing their victim identity or having to admit they might be wrong. That’s a scary concept for the ego.
The conclusion I have come to is to accept, then act if need be. If I can’t accept something, I look within to see what is causing the resistence. It always has to do with me and not someone else. Once my present situation is accepted fully, I can then act more efficiently than when I am in resistence. Resistence just creates more resistence in the mirror of the world we are looking at, so it’s up to me (and you) to make the world a better place.
Below are some quotes from “Loving What Is” by Byron Katie I think you will enjoy.
Be well,
Trey
If [he] says something that hurts, he’s just revealed what you haven’t wanted to look at yet. The man is a Buddha.
P 133
[W]e’re babies just learning how to live out our love. We keep trying to meet love in everything and everyone, because we haven’t noticed that we already have it, that we ARE it.
P 261
What I love most about reality is that it’s always the story of a past. And what I love most about the past is that it’s over.
P 269
“It’s a tree. It’s a table. It’s a chair.” Is it true? Have you stopped to ask yourself? Have you ever become still and listened as you asked you? Who told you it was a tree? Who was the original authority? How did they know? My entire life, my entire identity, had been built on the trust and uninquiring innocence of a child.
P 300
But even the Now is a concept. Even as the thought completes itself, it’s gone, with no proof that it ever existed, other than as a concept that would lead you to believe it existed, and now that one is gone too. Reality is always the story of a past. Before you can grasp it, it’s gone. Each of us already has the peaceful mind that we seek.
P 303
We [the world around you] don’t know how to change; we don’t know how to forgive or how to be honest. We’re waiting for an example. You’re the one. You are your only hope, because we’re not changing until you do. Our job is to keep coming at you, as hard as we can, with everything that angers, upsets, or repulses you, until you understand. We love you that much, whether we’re aware of it or not. The whole world is about you.
P 310
As an example, when I am engaged in a conversation with someone and they say something that I feel is untrue about myself, I accept that rather than react to it (unless I slip up). In fact, I go a step further to look for the truth in what is being said to me. Other people tend to point out the things in us that we don’t want to deal with or haven’t dealt with yet, especially if what they are saying causes an emotional reaction in us.
Aside from that, what they are saying is true for them even if I see it as being false. Sometimes I see how another person is actually projecting their own issues onto me, but I don’t point that out to them as that is their business. Plus, I may be tempted to use that observation as an escape route from my own culpability. The main thing I do is notice how I feel when that happens and respect the other person where they are on their journey. I don’t try to convince them they are wrong.
The reality of this moment is what is being presented to us, regardless of what form that takes. As Byron Katie points out, “When I argue with reality, I lose – but only 100% of the time.” So rather than argue with reality because I don’t like what it has presented, I try to make peace with it and take action from that space. I remember that we are always being presented with exactly what we need at this moment, otherwise it would not be happening. I try to look at my life situation as if it is calling me to awaken. Life serves as my mirror. My ideas about myself are projected out onto others and I can learn from that if I am open and not in a state of resistence.
It’s also been illustrated to me that someone else's pain that they take out on you, in the form of anger or hostility, ultimately may have nothing to do with you. It has to do with their own past pain. This makes it much easier for me not to take things personally, or at least notice when I do. If someone seems angry at me, I know deep down that I am playing an important role in bringing something to that person's attention that they have not dealt with yet, just as they are doing for me. I am just a mirror of them and vise versa, so I try to look at it from that perspective. Regardless of whether we are acting consciously or unconsciously, we are all part of a universal process designed to bring about freedom in one another, whether we like it or not, accept it or resist it.
When someone close to me is suffering and I want to help but don’t know what to do, I can accept "not knowing" as it is. In so doing, I have had ideas come to me out of that state of accepting my own confusion. In effect, clarity can come from a state of confusion when we surrender to the fact that we don’t have a clue what to do. Meditation can also aid in finding the "right" action by becoming fully present and putting out an intention or question. It's said that we can not ask a question we don't already know the answer to, which I have found to be true. That means we just need to clear our minds so that answer can come to us.
At this stage I am constantly seeing how identification with the past creates hostility and suffering in myself and other people. When I see two people arguing or saying things designed to hurt, or complaining about something someone said to them, I see how simple it would be for them to release that feeling, simply by doing The Work (as Byron Katie refers to it) on the issues at hand, or by becoming fully present with no concept of an imagined past. It is not the other person causing the suffering we experience, it’s our own thoughts about the situation or person. I typically don’t offer this up to people because they may not want to rid themselves of those feelings for fear of losing their victim identity or having to admit they might be wrong. That’s a scary concept for the ego.
The conclusion I have come to is to accept, then act if need be. If I can’t accept something, I look within to see what is causing the resistence. It always has to do with me and not someone else. Once my present situation is accepted fully, I can then act more efficiently than when I am in resistence. Resistence just creates more resistence in the mirror of the world we are looking at, so it’s up to me (and you) to make the world a better place.
Below are some quotes from “Loving What Is” by Byron Katie I think you will enjoy.
Be well,
Trey
If [he] says something that hurts, he’s just revealed what you haven’t wanted to look at yet. The man is a Buddha.
P 133
[W]e’re babies just learning how to live out our love. We keep trying to meet love in everything and everyone, because we haven’t noticed that we already have it, that we ARE it.
P 261
What I love most about reality is that it’s always the story of a past. And what I love most about the past is that it’s over.
P 269
“It’s a tree. It’s a table. It’s a chair.” Is it true? Have you stopped to ask yourself? Have you ever become still and listened as you asked you? Who told you it was a tree? Who was the original authority? How did they know? My entire life, my entire identity, had been built on the trust and uninquiring innocence of a child.
P 300
But even the Now is a concept. Even as the thought completes itself, it’s gone, with no proof that it ever existed, other than as a concept that would lead you to believe it existed, and now that one is gone too. Reality is always the story of a past. Before you can grasp it, it’s gone. Each of us already has the peaceful mind that we seek.
P 303
We [the world around you] don’t know how to change; we don’t know how to forgive or how to be honest. We’re waiting for an example. You’re the one. You are your only hope, because we’re not changing until you do. Our job is to keep coming at you, as hard as we can, with everything that angers, upsets, or repulses you, until you understand. We love you that much, whether we’re aware of it or not. The whole world is about you.
P 310
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Memories
I know by now you are well familiar with the idea that the present moment is all there ever is, has been or will be, but I wanted to use memories as an example of how one can touch that which is always present. Think back to your earliest memory. Visualize it as if you are reliving it. For me this was when I was two years old. My mom was going into the hospital to give birth to my brother. I was in the car with my uncle Bill and I had a can of peanuts between my legs. As we were pulling away I spilled the peanuts between my legs. As I was trying to pull them out from under me I realized that they had slid so far up under me that I couldn’t reach them. So I lifted my butt up and as I did the peanuts went sliding back under the seat and into the floor board (the back of the seat had a gap where it met the bottom seat). I also remember my uncle being a bit flustered by this.
When I think back on this memory, I look at what has not changed since then. The one who witnessed it all happen is the same one who is witnessing these words being typed on a screen. It is the same “I” that has witnessed all of my life situations and will continue to witness all of my life situations. It has not changed through out my entire life. My physical body has changed, my thoughts and ideas have changed, my likes and dislikes have changed; but that “I” that has witnessed it all has not changed. That is the ever present awareness of what goes on in daily life. Everything we experience happens in the space of that awareness, which is untouched by the mental interpretations of those experiences. The mind labels, judges and learns from these experiences, but the awareness behind it all has no stake in the outcome. It is simply here.
When you look back on any of your past experiences you are “seeing” them Now from that same awareness. Focusing your attention on that awareness is how you can “see” that which you really are, underneath the thoughts and mental labels. Asking yourself, “Who am I?” or “Who is this “I” that is witnessing all of these things happen (past or present)?” is a very effective way of turning your awareness back on itself, or becoming aware of awareness.
This awareness, which is the only thing about us that is real, is not ours alone. In fact, that awareness is what we all have in common. We are all that same ever present awareness beyond thought. That is what makes us all one.
Once you have become aware of your own awareness you can then look at others with that awareness and see them as that same awareness. They may look and act differently, have different life experiences, but deep down they are nothing more than that same pure awareness. You can, in effect, look through the eyes of another and see that there is a background of awareness behind everything they say, do and see.
It’s from this space of recognizing all as awareness where true compassion arises. Ultimately there is no difference between me and you. We are all just conscious awareness. This is what all of the spiritual teachings are pointing toward. They all provide pointers to going beyond thought so that we can view the world as this awareness, and, in so doing, Be that which we already are. Interacting with life situations from that space is how we can achieve a state of peace. A peace that most of us have only briefly glimpsed in our lives.
There are many practices that assist in disassociating with thoughts so that we can rest in that spacious awareness, but one of the most simple (other than self inquiry) is one that is mentioned in The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. Ask yourself, “I wonder what I am going to think next?” Then focus your attention and wait for a thought to occur as if you were a cat intensely watching a mouse hole. When a thought occurs, let it go and ask the question again. Then go back to waiting for the next thought. While in that state of waiting, without thought, you are completely present as that awareness.
There are many other portals to connecting with awareness and I recommend you try them all. Don’t just try them once. Engage in them on a regular basis throughout your day. It will become easier and easier to go deeper into self awareness. Just be still.
In peace,
Trey
When I think back on this memory, I look at what has not changed since then. The one who witnessed it all happen is the same one who is witnessing these words being typed on a screen. It is the same “I” that has witnessed all of my life situations and will continue to witness all of my life situations. It has not changed through out my entire life. My physical body has changed, my thoughts and ideas have changed, my likes and dislikes have changed; but that “I” that has witnessed it all has not changed. That is the ever present awareness of what goes on in daily life. Everything we experience happens in the space of that awareness, which is untouched by the mental interpretations of those experiences. The mind labels, judges and learns from these experiences, but the awareness behind it all has no stake in the outcome. It is simply here.
When you look back on any of your past experiences you are “seeing” them Now from that same awareness. Focusing your attention on that awareness is how you can “see” that which you really are, underneath the thoughts and mental labels. Asking yourself, “Who am I?” or “Who is this “I” that is witnessing all of these things happen (past or present)?” is a very effective way of turning your awareness back on itself, or becoming aware of awareness.
This awareness, which is the only thing about us that is real, is not ours alone. In fact, that awareness is what we all have in common. We are all that same ever present awareness beyond thought. That is what makes us all one.
Once you have become aware of your own awareness you can then look at others with that awareness and see them as that same awareness. They may look and act differently, have different life experiences, but deep down they are nothing more than that same pure awareness. You can, in effect, look through the eyes of another and see that there is a background of awareness behind everything they say, do and see.
It’s from this space of recognizing all as awareness where true compassion arises. Ultimately there is no difference between me and you. We are all just conscious awareness. This is what all of the spiritual teachings are pointing toward. They all provide pointers to going beyond thought so that we can view the world as this awareness, and, in so doing, Be that which we already are. Interacting with life situations from that space is how we can achieve a state of peace. A peace that most of us have only briefly glimpsed in our lives.
There are many practices that assist in disassociating with thoughts so that we can rest in that spacious awareness, but one of the most simple (other than self inquiry) is one that is mentioned in The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle. Ask yourself, “I wonder what I am going to think next?” Then focus your attention and wait for a thought to occur as if you were a cat intensely watching a mouse hole. When a thought occurs, let it go and ask the question again. Then go back to waiting for the next thought. While in that state of waiting, without thought, you are completely present as that awareness.
There are many other portals to connecting with awareness and I recommend you try them all. Don’t just try them once. Engage in them on a regular basis throughout your day. It will become easier and easier to go deeper into self awareness. Just be still.
In peace,
Trey
Friday, May 30, 2008
The Circle of Life - a brief overview
A few years ago, after I was diagnosed with epilepsy out of the blue, I began a search for answers. Within a few months it became clear that I was not going to find any clear cut answers regarding my diagnosis, but I felt driven to find out as much as I could about everything and anything. I consumed books on every imaginable subject from the brain to physics to religion to cosmology, etc. I eventually discovered what I had actually been searching for all along: Truth.
Over the past few years I have been sharing my experiences along the way with all of my friends and family in the hopes that my search would be contagious. After reading multiple books from multiple teachers, I have been lead to the point where all of the paths converge. This is my attempt to encapsulate all that I have learned.
The present moment is all there ever really is. Life is always unfolding right Now. The situations that arise are largely (if not completely) out of our control. It is not the situations that cause us pain, it is our thoughts about them. Events and situations can be blamed or resisted but it does not change the fact that they are here now. This is where acceptance comes into play. If you want to be truly happy in all that you do, the acceptance of what is is a crucial element. It’s profoundly simple actually. If you want to live a life of joy, simply love what is, in this moment.
Our beliefs are at the center of all of our negative emotions. When we encounter something that causes discomfort, we “believe” that what’s happening should not be happening. Beliefs are simply thought patterns we have picked up along the way that we use to judge the world around us. As I once read, if you think something is a fact rather than a belief, ask yourself if there is one person in the world who would disagree with that “fact”. If the answer is yes, then it is a belief and not a fact. When we believe things should be a certain way, we create the stage for disappointment and pain because things will not always fit in our belief system.
We are actually not who we think we are. We are so identified with our thoughts that we can’t see what lies underneath. What lies underneath is often referred to as awareness or consciousness. That is what we are. It is ever present but our thoughts cover up its existence. Our awareness is totally identified with our thoughts most of the time. Connecting with the awareness that we all are is true liberation from all pain and suffering, and we can connect with it anytime we so choose.
There are numerous ways to connect with who we truly are, but they all have a common thread. Though it can be described in a number of ways, these descriptions are simply pointers and not the absolute truth. Here are a few ways you can find your true identity:
Focus all of your attention on what you are doing Now. Give each activity, regardless of how insignificant, you fullest attention.
Focus your attention on your inner body. Feel what it feels like to feel your body. Become aware of that force that animates your body and how it feels to abide in this body.
Accept what occurs each moment without resistence. If the situation calls for you to take action your action will come from a space of acceptance and will be a much more effective response to any given situation. Realize that what is going on now is exactly what “should” be happening. The universe is giving us just what we need to grow even if it doesn’t seem like it on the surface.
Ask yourself, “Who am I?” Don’t look for an answer to the question. Simply focus your attention inward. Ask yourself repeatedly and “look” behind the question to see who it is that is asking the question. Who is it that is aware of the question being asked?
What all of the above practices have in common is that they stop the incessant stream of thoughts that pervade our everyday lives. It allows awareness to become aware of itself, and/or allows awareness space to act through us. This is a very powerful experience, but don’t create any preconceived notions about what it “should” be like. Don’t even do it with the intention of “getting” something out of it. These are the crafty thought patterns that can distract you from experiencing who you truly are. They allow you to judge the situation to see if you are doing it right.
One of the e-books I read recently (which is available for free at the link below) provides a clear understanding of the self inquiry method mentioned above. The book is called Meeting Ramana Maharshi by John Sherman. John is an ex-bank robber turned spiritual teacher and does an excellent job of putting Ramana’s teachings into perspective.
http://www.riverganga.org/
After reading it I began to practice focusing my awareness on the awareness that I am. It is simply a shift in perspective that is so obvious it gets overlooked, which is why it is often referred to as the cosmic joke. We’ve always been awareness and it’s been under our nose all along. So simple but so oddly difficult. My experience with turning my attention inward makes the world come alive. The colors and textures become much more vivid. Thought subsides and I am able to just Be. (See also my previous post on The Moving Sidewalk of Life) As John says, this inquiry is self realization and if you continue to practice it you will eventually no longer need to practice. It will become your normal state of being.
If you are interested in finding out who you truly are and freeing yourself from all forms of suffering, all it takes is your strong intention to do so and you will succeed. I highly recommend downloading the free e-book mentioned above and practicing turning your attention inward as often as possible. Incorporating daily meditation into your routine is extremely valuable regardless of how much time you take. Meditation can then become a part of your everyday life.
I wish you the very best in all that you do and am grateful that you took the time to read this. May it benefit you in some way. Wishing you eternal peace and love. After all, that’s what you already are even if you haven’t noticed yet :)
Trey
Over the past few years I have been sharing my experiences along the way with all of my friends and family in the hopes that my search would be contagious. After reading multiple books from multiple teachers, I have been lead to the point where all of the paths converge. This is my attempt to encapsulate all that I have learned.
The present moment is all there ever really is. Life is always unfolding right Now. The situations that arise are largely (if not completely) out of our control. It is not the situations that cause us pain, it is our thoughts about them. Events and situations can be blamed or resisted but it does not change the fact that they are here now. This is where acceptance comes into play. If you want to be truly happy in all that you do, the acceptance of what is is a crucial element. It’s profoundly simple actually. If you want to live a life of joy, simply love what is, in this moment.
Our beliefs are at the center of all of our negative emotions. When we encounter something that causes discomfort, we “believe” that what’s happening should not be happening. Beliefs are simply thought patterns we have picked up along the way that we use to judge the world around us. As I once read, if you think something is a fact rather than a belief, ask yourself if there is one person in the world who would disagree with that “fact”. If the answer is yes, then it is a belief and not a fact. When we believe things should be a certain way, we create the stage for disappointment and pain because things will not always fit in our belief system.
We are actually not who we think we are. We are so identified with our thoughts that we can’t see what lies underneath. What lies underneath is often referred to as awareness or consciousness. That is what we are. It is ever present but our thoughts cover up its existence. Our awareness is totally identified with our thoughts most of the time. Connecting with the awareness that we all are is true liberation from all pain and suffering, and we can connect with it anytime we so choose.
There are numerous ways to connect with who we truly are, but they all have a common thread. Though it can be described in a number of ways, these descriptions are simply pointers and not the absolute truth. Here are a few ways you can find your true identity:
Focus all of your attention on what you are doing Now. Give each activity, regardless of how insignificant, you fullest attention.
Focus your attention on your inner body. Feel what it feels like to feel your body. Become aware of that force that animates your body and how it feels to abide in this body.
Accept what occurs each moment without resistence. If the situation calls for you to take action your action will come from a space of acceptance and will be a much more effective response to any given situation. Realize that what is going on now is exactly what “should” be happening. The universe is giving us just what we need to grow even if it doesn’t seem like it on the surface.
Ask yourself, “Who am I?” Don’t look for an answer to the question. Simply focus your attention inward. Ask yourself repeatedly and “look” behind the question to see who it is that is asking the question. Who is it that is aware of the question being asked?
What all of the above practices have in common is that they stop the incessant stream of thoughts that pervade our everyday lives. It allows awareness to become aware of itself, and/or allows awareness space to act through us. This is a very powerful experience, but don’t create any preconceived notions about what it “should” be like. Don’t even do it with the intention of “getting” something out of it. These are the crafty thought patterns that can distract you from experiencing who you truly are. They allow you to judge the situation to see if you are doing it right.
One of the e-books I read recently (which is available for free at the link below) provides a clear understanding of the self inquiry method mentioned above. The book is called Meeting Ramana Maharshi by John Sherman. John is an ex-bank robber turned spiritual teacher and does an excellent job of putting Ramana’s teachings into perspective.
http://www.riverganga.org/
After reading it I began to practice focusing my awareness on the awareness that I am. It is simply a shift in perspective that is so obvious it gets overlooked, which is why it is often referred to as the cosmic joke. We’ve always been awareness and it’s been under our nose all along. So simple but so oddly difficult. My experience with turning my attention inward makes the world come alive. The colors and textures become much more vivid. Thought subsides and I am able to just Be. (See also my previous post on The Moving Sidewalk of Life) As John says, this inquiry is self realization and if you continue to practice it you will eventually no longer need to practice. It will become your normal state of being.
If you are interested in finding out who you truly are and freeing yourself from all forms of suffering, all it takes is your strong intention to do so and you will succeed. I highly recommend downloading the free e-book mentioned above and practicing turning your attention inward as often as possible. Incorporating daily meditation into your routine is extremely valuable regardless of how much time you take. Meditation can then become a part of your everyday life.
I wish you the very best in all that you do and am grateful that you took the time to read this. May it benefit you in some way. Wishing you eternal peace and love. After all, that’s what you already are even if you haven’t noticed yet :)
Trey
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